Finn shrugged. "The lass cares for you. Aye, it's not love. But I think it can be, one day. And this may be the only chance for you to have a child, Alistair. Even then, it's not a guarantee."
If he had the strength, he would've lifted his hands and rubbed his face. However, merely staying awake still drained his energy, so he settled for a sigh. "And I can't even talk with her before making a decision, aye?"
"No, Layla thinks it'll trigger your inner beast, and she doesn't want to use any more drugs than strictly necessary."
It was a reasonable decision. However, Alistair was at an important fork in his life, and he wanted not only to talk with the possible mother of his future child, but he also wanted his dragon's opinion as well.
And yet, he wouldn't be able to get either. Which meant he needed to decide for himself what to do.
Humans definitely had a harder time, he understood now, when it came to living life on their own.
Alistair had more questions than he could ever have answered, but he focused on the more important ones. "Does Kiyana understand the dangers, if she does conceive?"
"Aye, of course. She's been talking with both Layla and Fraser and Fergus's mates."
The MacKenzie twins' mates were humans, too. "That may give her a false sense of security about bearing a dragon-shifter child, Finn, and you know it. They both survived easily."
"And you know the reason why, too. Dragon-shifter blood injections seem to improve a human's chance of surviving childbirth. Kiyana will receive the same. Not yours, I'm afraid, as it's too diluted with drugs. But both of your brothers have volunteered, to ensure it'll come from the same gene pool as your child, which has provided the best results so far."
He loved his brothers most of the time but hated the thought that they could possibly save Kiyana when he couldn't.
Not wanting to dwell on negative thoughts, he focused on the question at hand. Would he allow Kiyana to try to conceive his child via artificial insemination or not?
Even without his beast, the image of Kiyana holding their baby, smiling down at the bairn, sent a course of want through his body. For years, he'd put off thinking of a family or the future. However, Kiyana had made him want it all, and more, once again.
If this was the only way he could achieve it, then it'd have to be so.
"Aye, I agree. However, I want to know as soon as she's pregnant. I don't want to hear excuses about it setting off my beast, or some other bloody excuse."
Finn reached out to squeeze his shoulder. "You have my word, Alistair." The dragonman released his grip. "I hope you're strong enough for the task of getting the seed your female will need. Otherwise I'll be teasing you for decades about how you needed help. Asking for help in most things is okay, but a random male nurse rubbing my dick? Och, that I don't want."
Alistair knew Finn was trying to lighten the mood, but his teasing wasn't going to work this time. "I'll be fine. Send the doctor as soon as you can. I don't want to keep Kiyana waiting and guessing."
Finn moved toward the door. "I know you can't see or talk with her, but do you want me to pass along a message?"
What was someone supposed to say to a female who had tried so hard to save you, to the point she was trying to change how the entire world worked, and was even willing to bear your child without even a kiss or caress to make it all more enjoyable? Alistair had no bloody idea.
So he merely replied, "Tell her thank you."
Finn studied him a second before nodding. "Aye, I will. But I hope you know that's not the way to woo a lass's heart. You're going to have to try harder once you're out and well."
Alistair grunted. He didn't want wooing advice from Finn at the moment. "Aye, I know that."
It was all he could say, really. Although if he ended up surviving without his dragon, Alistair might not be in the best frame of mind to woo anyone.
No. He couldn't think like that. Kiyana deserved better. Even without his beast, he'd have to try his hardest to make her happy. Not just because he was grateful, but because he wanted to be the male Kiyana deserved.
Finn murmured, "It'll all be fine, Alistair. You'll see."
He grunted louder this time, and Finn left him alone.
Everything may not be fine in the end—Alistair knew pain and tragedy better than most—but he wouldn't give up on a life he wanted simply because he could end up half the male h
e'd been.
No, even if he had to live as a human, never being able to shift again, he'd do it. Because soon more than himself would depend upon him. Soon, if he for once had a break in his life, he'd have a mate and child, too.
And to a dragon-shifter with any sense of honor, that was worth fighting against any obstacle for.