He nodded and pulled out his phone to begin texting. “Of course, whatever you need. The driver’s just around the corner, I’ll get him to swing around.”
I shook my head. “I don’t mean your mansion, Marcus. I mean my house.”
He paused uncertainly, still holding the phone. “We can go to East Hollywood if you like. I didn’t think you’d want to go back there.”
“My actual house,” I slipped on my shoes, ignoring the silent tears that continued to stream unabashedly down my face. “My house in Washington. My mom’s house,” I corrected with a little sigh.
There was a brief pause before the light in Marcus’s eyes seemed to fade out and die.
“I’ll go with you,” he said softly.
“I need my family.”
“I am your family.”
“I love you. But I need some time to think, okay? I need a little time to be alone, to figure this all out.”
“You don’t want me to go?” he asked.
I nodded wordlessly, slipping my arms into my jacket and gathering up my purse.
“Rebecca,” he pleaded suddenly, “please let me come. I mean…this is as unexpected for me as it is for you. I can even stay in a hotel, that would be fine. I just want to be there with you.”
“I’m the one who’s pregnant. You could go home right now and live a normal life, never think about this day again. I can’t do that anymore. Everything’s changed. Permanently.”
“It’s changed for both of us.” He made a grab for my hands as I paced to the door. “You can’t possibly think I could just go home and pretend like nothing’s happened. Rebecca, we’re in this together. That’s my baby too.”
“When I heard our child’s heartbeat, I realized t
his is a real human being. It makes everything more real.”
“And I love this baby more than anything,” Marcus said. “I want to get married and raised this baby together.”
Two things I was scared of: marriage and having children. I didn’t feel rage at all. Just pure, blind panic. I was going to marry a guy I didn’t even know that well. And have a child with him. What the hell was wrong with me? I needed space to sort it out. I felt like I was backed into a corner.
“Please talk to me,” he said.
“I’m the one who decided to get into a fake relationship with you. I’m the one who snuck down the hall and fell into your bed.”
I wiped the tears from my face and pulled in a shaky breath. But despite my massive preoccupation, the look on his face was killing me, and I tried to make him understand.
“I’m not going to do anything drastic—if that’s what you’re worried about. I don’t want an abortion. And I want this baby. I do. I just need time to think. I’m just…I think I have about another hour or two before I completely lose my mind. I cannot believe this is happening right now…and I need to be with my family.”
His face froze up, and he took a robotic step backward as I reached for the door.
I sucked in a guilty breath as I walked past him, but now was no time to mince words. If no other time but now, we had to tell the truth.
“We haven’t known each other that long, Marcus.” My eyes flickered up apologetically. I then started to head into the hall. “I’m sorry.”
Chapter 3
After spending the last three years in the heart of Los Angeles, I’d forgotten that Washington had things like seasons. The wind was howling through a darkened, stormy sky as I touched down at Seattle-Tacoma International and gazed out the window. I deliberately wasted some time as I meandered down through the terminal. Maybe I was scared to face my mother and tell her everything that was happening. I’d come straight from the clinic in my rush to get there, so the first thing I did was buy one of those cheesy Washington State tourist sweatshirts. After about a half an hour, I rented a car (something that I was just legally old enough to do) and got onto the freeway. That’s right, I could have a baby, but it was only three months ago that I was considered responsible enough to rent a car.
My mother’s house was only about forty-five minutes away. An hour, with how slowly I was driving in the rain. It was in a beautiful little city called Everett, right on the Puget Sound. I remembered that growing up, I’d been completely intimidated by its daunting size. The first time I was turned loose to navigate the city bus system with Amanda in high school, I’d had a full-on panic attack. After living in Los Angeles, I found its industrial sprawl rather quaint.
The raging storm had blown down several of her meticulously kept potted plants, and she was struggling to drag them all into the open garage as I pulled up behind her in the driveway. I hurried out of the car.
“Rebecca?” She raised her hand like a visor and squinted in the rain. “What on earth are you doing here, sweetie?”