"Seriously?" I look over at Ethan.
"He lost his tooth at nine o’clock," he says. "It was that or the hundred."
I try to roll my lips. "The struggle must have been real."
He pushes my shoulder as everyone laughs. The minute we get to the barbecue, I go one way and Asher goes the other. I walk over to my mother who sits by herself and see Gabriel collecting money from my father. "Hi," I say when I get close enough, and she looks at me, and she smiles big.
"Hey, baby girl," she says. "He’s going to walk out of this backyard a very rich boy," she says, pointing at Gabriel, who is getting money from my uncle Casey. I pull out the empty chair right beside her and sit down. "Do you want some lemonade?” my mother asks, and I just shake my head. "Are you okay?"
"I’m fine, why?" I ask, and she smiles and then looks down at the table, then up at me again.
"You’re just …" she says. "You’re just different."
My eyebrows pinch together in confusion. "How so?" I ask.
"One, you look happier," she says. "And two, your eyes shine all the time."
"My eyes are the same they have always been."
"No, they aren’t," she says, and I can see her eyes filling with tears. "There was a sadness in them." She blinks away the tears.
"There was no sadness there." My stomach sinks.
"There was," she tells me. "And you can deny it and ignore it, but it was there and now ..." Her hand comes up to cup my cheek. "But now there is a light in them that I’ve never seen." Her eyes leave mine and go into the direction of Asher, who stands there talking and laughing with my father and Ethan. "He’s good for you," she says.
I swallow the lump in my throat. "It’s nothing," I finally say, the words coming out in a whisper.
"It’s not nothing." She puts her hand on mine. "It’s everything." She is about to say something else when my aunt Olivia calls her inside. She gets up, rubbing my head. "Don’t push it away."
I sit in the chair for what feels like an eternity. Only moving to get food and then when Asher comes to get me to leave.
I get into the truck, the whole time not saying anything. He reaches out and grabs my hand once he gets into the car and kisses the top of my hand once we drive away from my grandparents' house. "Are you okay?" he asks when he pulls into the driveway of my house.
My hand reaches to open the door. "Yeah, I’m just tired, I guess." I get out of the truck, and for the first time, I don’t attack him when we get into the door. Instead, I walk over to the kitchen and open the fridge to get a water bottle out.
"What’s wrong?" He stands there in the middle of the living room, looking at me. "You can’t tell me you’re just tired. I’ve seen your tired face before." His hand goes up and points at me. "Something happened today at the barbecue, and I’m not going to drop it until you tell me."
I look down, gathering all the courage I need for this next part. Knowing that in one small move, he can shatter me. "My mother said I looked different." His eyebrows pinch together in the same confused face I must have given my mother. "I fell in love without even knowing it." The lump starts to grow bigger in my throat. Heat rushes up my back to my neck, and I think I’m going to be physically sick. "I fell in love, and I didn’t even know it was happening until it did." I blink away the tears. "I’m in love with you," I say the words while my heart soars in my chest. "And I know without a shadow of a doubt that I won’t survive without you." I wipe the lone tear that comes out of the corner of my eye.
"I don’t know what love is," he finally says. "Never knew love growing up, never knew love when I became a man." He walks to me and turns me to look at him. "What I do know is that being with you makes breathing easier. I know that when you walk into a room, all I can do is smile. I know that kissing you is the single best thing I’ll ever do in my life. I know that the thought of being without you makes my chest hurt. A pain that feels like something is pressing or stomping on my body and crushing my bones.” He pushes the hair away from my face, his big hands coming up to cup my face, and right before his lips meet mine, he says the words that I’ve never heard from anyone but my family. "I love you, Amelia."