She dug back now, mind clear, to try to see it as it had been.
“Shadows. There were shadows. How could there be shadows without the sun? I’d forgotten, didn’t tell Branna. I was too wound up, I suppose.”
“It’s all right. You’re telling me now.”
“The shadows moved with me, and in them I felt warm—but I wasn’t, Connor. I was freezing, but I thought I was warm. Is that sensible at all?”
“If you mean do I understand, I do. His magick’s as cold as it is dark. The warmth was a trick for your mind, as the desire was.”
“The rest is as I told you. Him calling my name, and me standing there, with my hand about to part the vines, wanting to go in, so much, wanting to answer the call of my name. And Roibeard and Kathel to my rescue.”
“If you’ve a mind to walk from work to the cottage, or when you guide your customers, stay clear of that area, much as you can.”
“I will, of course. It’s habit takes me by there, and habits can be broken. Branna made me a charm in any case. As did Iona, and then Fin pushed yet another on me.”
Connor dug into his pocket, pulled out a small pouch. “As I am.”
“My pockets will be full of magick pouches at this rate.”
“Do this. Keep one near your door here, and one in your lorry, one near your bed—sleep’s vulnerable. Then one in your pocket.” He put the pouch into her hand, closed her fingers over it. “Always, Meara.”
“All right. That’s a fine plan.”
“And wear this.” Out of his pocket he drew a long thin band of leather that held polished beads.
“It’s pretty. Why am I wearing it?”
“I made it when I was no more than sixteen. It’s blue chalcedony here, and some jasper, some jade. The chalcedony is good protection from magick of the dark sort, and the jade’s helpful for protection from psychic attack—which you’ve just experienced. The jasper’s good all around as a protective stone. So wear it, will you?”
“All right.” She slipped it over her head. “You can have it back when we’re done with this. It’s cleverly done,” she added, studying it. “But you’ve always been clever with your hands.”
The instant the words were out, she winced inwardly at the phrase. “So, that’s filled you in on the highs and lows of my day, and I’m grateful for the pizza—even if it came from my own freezer.”
She started to get up, clear the dishes, but he just put a hand on her arm, nudged her back again.
“We haven’t finished the circle yet, as we’ve been working backward. And that takes us to last night.”
“I already told you nothing was meant by it.”
“What you told me was bollocks.”
The easy, almost cheerful tone of his voice made her want to rail at him, so she deliberately kept her tone level. “I’ve had enough upheaval for one day, Connor.”
“Sure we might as well get it all over and done at once. We’re friends, are we not, Meara?”
“We are, and that’s exactly the point I’m making.”
“It wasn’t the kiss of a friend, even one upset and shaken, you gave me. Nor was it the kiss of a friend I gave you when I got beyond the first surprise of it.”
She shrugged, to show how little it all meant—and wished her stomach would stop all the fluttering. You’d think she’d swallowed a swarm of butterflies instead of half a frozen pizza.
“If I’d known you’d be so wound up about a kiss, it wouldn’t have happened.”
“A man who wasn’t wound up after a kiss like that would’ve been dead for six months. And I’m betting he’d still feel a stir.”
“That only means I’m good at it.”
He smiled. “I wouldn’t argue with your skill. I’m saying it wasn’t friend to friend, and distress. Not that alone.”