Serafina waved around the room. "You won't be in this hospital bed forever, right? Once you can walk again, what will you do? Where will you go? Unless the Knights are defeated, the second you step off of Stonefire, they'll find you and eradicate one of their weaknesses."
Ivy had never thought of herself as one of the Knights' weaknesses, but given the data she'd stolen, she probably was a bigger threat than she'd realized. Back when she'd stolen it, the data had only been a means of securing safety.
Which had failed.
Richard. Images of her older brother laughing, his partner teasing Ivy, and the three of them enjoying some time on the Brighton Pier in the summer came rushing back.
Serafina's soft voice broke through her memories. "You're thinking of your brother, aren't you?"
Her gaze shot to the dragonwoman's. "Why would you say that?"
"Given everything I've read, he and his partner were your only family, your only weaknesses. Well, unless you're secretly pining to return to the Knights."
"Never," she growled, the intensity surprising even herself.
Serafina bobbed her head. "I thought so, and your response is believable. However, you're going to have to work hard to convince everyone of how that is the truth."
Ivy should say nothing and merely tell the dragonwoman what she wanted to hear. That would get her out of her room as quickly as possible.
And yet anger flooded her body. Anger at what she'd done to her brother, at the Knights for using and disposing of her, and even anger at no one believing her when she was being bloody sincere.
She'd done awful things, and would always have to live with that. But Ivy was trying her best to make up for it, and no one seemed to notice or give a shit.
And while Serafina hadn't said anything that others hadn't said already, something snapped inside Ivy. "What else do I bloody need to do? I nearly died coming here with information you lot needed. Then I lost a year of my life to a coma, courtesy of some unknown drug the Knights gave me. And then I've been offering information whenever asked of me. Do I need to cut off one of my legs to prove how serious I am? Or, do I need to charge into battle and help take down the Knights myself before anyone gives me a chance? Tell me, Dr. Rossi, what's the magical next step I need to take on my road of recovery?"
The dragonwoman didn't miss a beat. "With the clan, that's easy—give them all the information needed to decrypt the data you brought."
"I already offered to do that, but Zain said I couldn't meet with the men or women in charge of that task."
Serafina folded her arms across her chest. "Then I'll see what I can arrange. But the other aspect, to come to terms with what you've done internally, within yourself, will be much harder."
Ivy didn't think she'd ever be able to forgive herself for what had happened to her brother and David. Nothing would bring either of them back from the dead.
However, she was in such a mood that she motioned with her hand and demanded, "Then tell me your advice, Doctor."
"You'll need to grieve properly, first and foremost. And commit to regular sessions with me. I think you need at least one person you can be yourself with and not hide anything. And since you're my patient, I won't hold judgment. Every step I take will be based on what I think needs to be done to help you heal."
Ivy growled, "Which is close to what the Friends of the World told me, back when they first lured me in to try and get me into the Dragon Knights."
Serafina tilted her head. "And whilst the Protectors will want to hear more of that process with the Friends of the World, I'm more concerned about you. I'm a fully licensed psychologist, unlike those fake ones you dealt with before. My goal isn't to brainwash. No, it's quite the opposite—to help you see the world through your own eyes."
For a split second, Ivy yearned to have someone she could unload to, a person to talk with who wouldn't growl, condescend, or outright speak with hatred toward her.
And yet, the thought of baring so much of herself to Serafina made her nervous. The Knights had used the information from her sessions against her over the years, to keep her in line. Not only that, but her personal revelations had probably also led them straight to her brother and his partner.
However, this time, Ivy had nothing to lose. No family, no friends. Not even a few quid to her name.
With nothing to lose, she shrugged and said, "Fine. But not today. I need time to wrap my head around talking with anyone about some of the worst parts of myself."
Serafina stood and bobbed her head. "I wasn't planning on talking with you today, anyway. But request me at any time, Ivy. I have a feeling you'll need me sooner than you think."
With that cryptic statement, Serafina exited the room, leaving Ivy alone again before she could ask about meeting with the IT personnel working on her thumb drive data.
She'd have to make that request again as soon as possible.
However, as Ivy sat in her bed and stared at the blank wall, it was hard to believe she'd really just agreed to talk with Serafina on a regular basis, most likely baring her soul in the process.
The only positive was that it was true—Ivy didn't have anything to lose. No, she only had things to gain. Namely, the ability to grieve and vent on occasion. It'd take some time to get to the harder stuff, such as her massive guilt and maybe even overcoming it one day.