Both Dottie and Billy looked at Renie.
“What?”
Dottie stood up and put her arms around Renie. She looked at her son and husband and moved her eyes in the direction of the other room. Dottie let go of Renie once they’d left the room.
“How are you doin’?”
“It doesn’t matter.”
“It’s all that matters, sweet girl.” Dottie kissed the top of her head. “It’s all that matters to him.”
“It shouldn’t be. He’s got a daughter to think about now. He won’t have time for…”
“For you? You don’t think so? Oh, Renie, when are you gonna realize that Billy loves you? He loves you more than anything.”
“I can’t do this,” she answered, barely a whisper.
Renie pushed away from Dottie, put on her coat, and walked out of the Patterson’s kitchen, hoping Dottie wouldn’t try to keep her from leaving. Hoping more that Dottie wouldn’t tell Billy she left.
She walked through the woods back to Billy’s, grabbed her keys, and drove home to Fort Collins.
Her and Billy…what? What about her and Billy? Was God trying to tell her something? And if so, what? Did this happen so she could help him through it? Or was it a sign that she and Billy shouldn’t have crossed the line they had in the last couple of weeks?
She was south of Denver when she called her mom.
“Hey, Mom,” she said when Liv answered the phone. “I need to take a few days off from school. I’d like to come to Crested Butte. Okay?”
“You don’t ever have to ask, Renie. This is your home as much as it’s mine. You know that.”
“Thanks, Mom. And thank Ben for me, too. I’ll be there tomorrow afternoon sometime.”
“Are you sure you want to drive here alone? Ben could come and get you.”
“No, I want to drive. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Renie hung up before either of two things happened, she told her mom what was going on with Billy, or she started to cry.
If she wanted to, she could cry the whole way there tomorrow with no one to see her, or judge her for her tears.
7
If she left by five, she’d be in Crested Butte before noon. When she called Billy last night after she got back to Fort Collins, she heard the hurt in his voice when he answered the phone.
“Hey.”
“I’m sorry I left that way, Billy. But I had to.”
“It’s okay.”
“It isn’t okay. I know it isn’t. But…I don’t know what else to say.”
“This isn’t your problem. It’s my problem.”
“That isn’t fair, Billy.”
“I got this, Renie. Whatever happens, it’s my responsibility. It’s on me, I get that.”
“I need some time.”
“You know where to find me. I’m not goin’ anywhere.”