I totally forgot about that.
She had a knowing look in her eyes, like she’d suspected that would happen. “I got the questions beforehand so you’d be able to think about your responses.” She pulled them out of her folder and set them on the desk. “But even if you did this on the fly, I’m sure you’d be great.”
I grabbed the paper but didn’t read it. “I thought I had residency tomorrow.”
“I had someone else fill in for you. And have you considered the documentary further?”
“Um…I guess it’s fine. But they can’t feature anything about my personal life at all. Otherwise, I walk.”
“I don’t think that will be a problem.” She made the note anyway. “Well, is there anything else you need before I go? I’m meeting the decorator at the Four Seasons to go over a couple things.”
I shook my head. “Nope. You took care of everything.”
She didn’t smile at my comment and rose to her feet so she could leave. “How’s Mr. Garcia doing?”
I didn’t like the way she deflected my statement, but she had every right to close off from me. “Just some anxiety.”
“I’m surprised he can’t tell the difference between anxiety and a cardiac event.” She was possessive of my time and didn’t like it when anyone wasted it, even if it was just for a couple seconds.
I shrugged. “Anxiety is complicated, and we still don’t really understand it. It’s pretty amazing how a mental state can trigger this physical reaction, even pain. My job as a physician isn’t just to heal people, but to ease their doubts and fears so they can be in a good cognitive state. The mind is a powerful thing, and if that’s compromised, if there are doubts and negativity, it can affect the recovery process. So, it’s really no big deal.”
She held the folder to her chest with both arms, her guard dropping for a moment as her softness came through in her gaze. “I never really thought about it that way. I think most doctors aren’t that compassionate. But you are. I don’t know why I continue to be surprised by it.” She turned away before I had a chance to react to her words, and it seemed like she wanted to leave the office as quickly as possible, like she couldn’t have allowed me to see even that momentarily glimpse of affection.
I sat at the table alone with my beer in front of me, waiting for Derek to return from the bar with his second round. I looked out the window into the January fog once again, barely able to decipher the cars that drove by. I felt lost, despite the fact that I was back at work, back at my research, back to living my life rather than just existing.
Derek returned, but he wasn’t alone. “Denise, this is my brother, Dex.”
I turned to look at her, seeing a pretty blonde who was totally my type. But then again, all women were my type. “Uh, hi.” I leaned forward and shook her hand, then waited for my brother to explain how he knew this very attractive woman in a bar.
Derek looked at me. “I told her I was married but said I would introduce her to my very single brother to make up for her disappointment.” He fell into the chair across from me, holding his glass of scotch.
“Oh.” I stared at her blankly, unsure what to do now, which was odd because I always knew what to do. I just had to be myself and turn on the charm, and after a couple hours, we would both be naked in my apartment, on the couch, the armchair, the dining table…all over the place.
Denise’s smile wavered when I didn’t look giddy to meet her. “Bad time?”
My mind was still drawing a blank, as if I’d lost my ability to talk. “Actually, yeah. Maybe another time.”
She was either pissed off at my reaction or she just took a major hit to her self-esteem. When I turned back to Derek, he was looking at me with a distinct expression.
An expression that clearly said What the fuck was that?
“Should you be drinking scotch on a Wednesday—”
“Care to explain what just happened?”
“What? Do I have to go after every single woman I see?” I asked incredulously.
“No. But you do.”
“Well, maybe she’s not my type.”
Both of his eyebrows rose. “You told me they’re all your type.”
“Look, I’m just not in the mood, alright? Drop it.”
“I know you aren’t,” he snapped. “You’ve been down this entire time. I’ve just been waiting for you to tell me why.”
My elbows rested on the table, and I looked down into my drink. “Just been a long week…”
“Yeah?”
I played with the bottle between my hands before I leaned back and looked at him. “A couple days ago, Sicily came into my office and…basically told me how she felt.”