She moved to straddle me. “Don’t think about the what-ifs right now.”
“I have to, only because it’s related to what I’m about to say.”
She kissed my nose. “Okay.”
“I didn’t go with my gut when I left you back in New Hampshire. If something doesn’t feel right, it probably isn’t. Leaving you never felt right. I thought the way for you to live your best life was to experience it apart from me, but maybe it should have been with me. Maybe things don’t always have to be by the book. Maybe we need to go by what feels right.”
“I never had any doubt that I belong where you are.”
“I know you didn’t.” I caressed her cheek. “I’ve had a lot of time to think while stuck in that hospital. I asked myself, what would I want if I knew my time was limited? Because it very well could be. Aneurysm or not, none of us knows for sure if we’re guaranteed a lot of time on this Earth. I decided what I want more than anything is to travel the world with you. I want to show you some of the places I’ve been, experience them again with you, and then discover new places together. Maybe it’s not college in Vermont you need. Maybe traveling with me is how you can sow your oats.”
“Wha—” Heather began.
But I forged ahead. “When I was lying there, recovering in that bed, I realized I haven’t done nearly all of the things I want to do. And I’ve lived a pretty good life. In the end, all we have are memories. I don’t have nearly enough memories with you. I want to make some. What do you say? Will you go on an adventure with me?”
“Really? Are you sure? I mean…how can we afford it?”
“I made some smart investments in my twenties. I have a lot saved up—probably at least fifty grand to play with before I’d even feel a dent. We can set a financial limit and stop when we’ve reached it. Then we’ll come back, and you can enroll in school here, if that’s what you want.” I tried to read her expression. “If you think it’s too reckless, we don’t have to—”
“This sounds like a dream. I just can’t believe it’s an option.”
“It’s very much an option. And I hope you’ll say yes.”
After several seconds of silence, she said, “I would love to travel with you. The answer is yes!”
It felt like my heart was doing cartwheels. “Yeah?”
“Yeah.” She wrapped her arms around my neck. “Let’s make some memories.”***Despite our excitement about our plans to travel the world, we had to be patient. Only after three months of follow-up visits did my doctor finally clear me for travel. Thanks to my father, who agreed to let us move the guinea pigs into his house for the months we would be away, we didn’t have to worry about them.
The wait was worth it as I found myself looking out at the Grand Canyon from our rented van, parked at the spot we’d booked on the south rim side.
We were spending a week here before flying to Australia. We figured since we’d be flying toward the West Coast anyway, why not spend some time out here? Heather considered this another good exposure exercise for her fear of heights, too. Living out of the converted van allowed us to save funds for some of the more expensive parts of our journey to come.
This week our days had started early. Heather and I woke before the sun came up, because that offered the best lighting for the photos I’d been taking. We were documenting this entire trip and had dubbed it Heather and Noah Do the World. Heather had actually started a blog for it, and she was having a blast creating the posts. She’d brought along the Merry Wanderer Hummel I’d bought her for her twenty-first birthday, and she took photos of it in all different locations. I’d never imagined how prophetic that figurine would be.
After our morning photos, we’d cook some breakfast on a small grill before deciding what we wanted to explore that day.
Right now, we watched the reddish-orange sunset over the canyon as we lay in the van after a post-hike, late-afternoon nap. This was definitely the life.
I curled into her body. “Is it wrong that all I’ve wanted to do this week is look out at this view, eat, and fuck you? And then eat you?”
She rubbed her hand across my chest. “Do you see me complaining?”
I’d always been hot for Heather, but since my health crisis, I was completely insatiable. Having that brush with death made me want to feel everything all the time. And there was nothing I enjoyed feeling more than my gorgeous girlfriend. I couldn’t get enough of her. I didn’t remember when they said men reached their sexual peak, but mine was clearly thirty-five.