He’s right, I know. “I was lost in thought.”
“You’re not very graceful.”
“And you’re not very…” My words waver. I can think about a hundred things Sam is very in some ways right now but am at a loss for what he’s not. I close my eyes in a long blink. “Thanks.” I slide my hands down Sam’s chest, feeling every ripple of muscle beneath my fingers. “You’re sweaty.”
“It’s hot outside.” He releases one hand from my waist and brings it up, gently brushing a renegade curl out of my eyes.
“Yes…hot. Out. Outside.” There aren’t many people who can make me go nonverbal, but Sam is one of them. My pulse was already pounding, and I swear my asshole of a heart is going to give everything away. Sam’s hands are on me, and things are still very PG right now, yet my body is craving more.
“You’re working out again?” he asks, and I have to think to get what he’s asking. Right. He saw me this morning in workout clothes.
“I didn’t end up running this morning,” I start. “I put my workout clothes on and then, um, got food instead.”
Sam chuckles, lips curving into a smile. “That sounds like you.”
I nod and my fingers brush over the waistband of Sam’s pants, causing butterflies to take flight in my stomach. What is wrong with me? I stand this close to Sam for a few seconds and I’m back to my old schoolgirl self, nervous and pining for a man I’ll never have.
“It’s purposely misleading,” I go on, unable to stop myself from rambling. “I could be hungover and looking like shit, but people will think I just worked out really hard and give me the benefit out of the doubt.”
“I like the way you think.” He’s looking right into my eyes, and I realize my hands are still awkwardly hovering over his crotch, though he doesn’t seem to mind.
“You were working out,” I say and bring my hands to his biceps, wanting the excuse to touch him again. “Do you run a lot?”
“Not as much as I should. I mostly lift.”
“I can tell.” I sink my teeth into my bottom lip, biting down hard, and not thinking about how Sam could interpret it. He deeply inhales again and starts to lean in. My heart jumps—is he going to kiss me? I’ve dreamed about his lips on mine so many times. Wished for it. Prayed for it. Hell, I even tried to cast a love spell on him when I was thirteen. I quickly un-cast it, afraid of him fake-falling for me and then the spell wearing off and realizing it was all a sham.
A group of women come down the trail, talking and laughing loudly. Sam and I break apart, and it’s only then I realize I was holding my breath, too afraid to breathe.
“I’ll get your phone,” Sam rushes out and moves down the steep hill with grace. He’s in incredible shape, and I could watch him scale down hills like this all day long. He climbs back up just as easily and hands me my phone. My fingers brush over his and I wish I was back in his arms, having him look at me like I’m the only thing that matters in the world.
Now that the moment is over, he steps away, diverting his eyes.
“Thanks,” I say as I wind the cord of my headphones around the phone.
“I’m surprised you don’t have cordless earbuds,” Sam notes.
“Oh, I do. This is a testament of how antisocial I am,” I start, smiling as I talk. “I like to go to coffee shops to write sometimes and usually have my hair down, hiding the earbuds. This way people know I’m listening to music and won’t try to talk to me.”
Sam runs his hand through his already messy hair and laughs. It’s not fair how good he can look after a run. When I run in the heat like this, my cheeks are flush and I have sweat everywhere, which I’m suddenly very aware of.
“Do you want to cool down with me?” Sam asks. “Or did you just start your run?”
“I’ll walk. I didn’t really set out to run today but more to clear my head.”
We start down the trail, going back the way I came.
“Everything all right?”
“Yeah.” I nod. “I got a little stuck on the chapter I’m writing. It’s so frustrating when the words won’t come to me.”
“That would be frustrating. Did coming out here help?”
Seeing you half-naked and glistening with sweat certainly did. “I think so.”
“It’s not going to rain today,” Sam notes after we walk a few paces. “Though right now rain would be nice.”
“Yeah, it would be nice. I wish the lake wasn’t so warm.”
Sam nods in agreement. “It feels like bathwater.”
I look at Sam, heart rate picking up speed again. We shared a moment back there, I’m sure of it. And I want that moment to happen again.