“I don’t know. I guess I grew up.”
“Sometimes it’s hard for a parent to see their child that way.”
“I know. I do understand, even if you don’t think that I do or that I could. The thing is, Scarlet understands too. She knew this was coming. She never wanted to have to choose between us, but if it was a choice, she would have picked you. I promised her that she wouldn’t have to, and she believed me. She believed in me.”
Elodie threw up her hands and spun around to grasp the sink like she needed it to hold her up.
“I just don’t understand,” she moaned. “You and my best friend. You’re so different. The age difference is so big. You don’t even seem like a good match for each other. You’re a nurse and she likes clothes. If you told me that your girlfriend was fifteen years older than you, I’d be concerned no matter who she was. I’d ask what you could possibly have in common right now, let alone years later. I’d be just as worried.”
“But you wouldn’t be mad. You wouldn’t blame her.”
“No. I don’t know. Maybe I would, since she should know better. I’d need some time, I’ll give you that.”
“Sometimes opposites attract. That’s what everyone says, but sometimes it’s not always that people are opposite where it counts. Scarlet has a good heart. She’s kind. She’s wise. She’s smart.”
“She can’t be that smart or that kind or very wise if sh
e’d let you talk her into any of this, thinking that it was going to work out.”
“Mom,” Neera said, a little too sharply. She softened her words by taking her mom’s hand. “Let’s just stop. Okay. Let’s take a break from the crappy feelings and try happiness now. Let’s see if things work. Your best friend seriously needs you and I know that you’re not the kind of person who can ignore that. I know you’re torn up inside. Let’s just call a truce for now and go over there and be a family together, like we always have been.”
“That would be faking it.”
“No. No way. That part would be totally real.” Neera clutched her mom’s hand a bit tighter. “And for what it’s worth, I’m truly sorry. Not that I fell in love with Scarlet or that I chose her, but for the hurt that I’ve caused. I’m a nurse, but I’m also a daughter, a friend, and just a regular human being, and I don’t want to cause people pain.”
“If you continue on with this, you know that it will only cause more. Your grandma and grandpa will shit bricks. Marla will probably lose it for good and blacklist us both.”
“It wouldn’t be the first time that I got you into that situation.”
Neera was swallowed up by her mom’s strong, warm arms faster than she could comprehend. “Don’t say that,” Elodie whispered brokenly. “Never say that. Having you was the best thing I ever did. The best, you hear me, Neera Jane James?”
Neera’s throat got all thick as her heart swelled. “I hear you,” she breathed. She clung to her mom like she was a kid again and soaked up that comfort.
All week she’d had her doubts, but right then she knew that whatever dumpster fires were coming down the bend because that was just life and there was always one fire or another cropping up, they’d be okay.
“There probably isn’t a single person in any lifetime or era that hasn’t known heartbreak, shock, loss, or even betrayal at some point,” Elodie sighed. “I don’t want to be a soapy family. The kind that constantly has drama. I want to be a happy family with good friends and lots of love.”
Neera’s eyes stung and she angled into her mom’s shoulder so that the bridge of her nose was pressed up against her mom’s sweater. It helped in holding back the tears. “I want all the good things. For all of us.”
“I don’t know if that’s possible right away, but I’ll try. I can’t talk you out of it, so what other option is there?”
Neera pulled back. “Thank you.” She broke into a beaming smile. “Thank you for saying you’ll try. Thank you for saying you can’t talk me out of it. It’s like trying to change my mind about tuna casserole. It’s not going to happen. Ever.”
“I know that. You’re as stubborn as I am.”
“You’re not stubborn. Not all the time. Just sometimes.”
“Can we head over there now?” Elodie glanced longingly at her cup of tea. “As soon as I’m done that is. I need some warmth before we go out in the cold.” She paused, her face pinched. “Do you think that Scarlet will think we’re crazy, coming up there together? Or- because of the other night? I can’t believe I actually did that.” She pulled the bag out of her tea and threw it in the trash, then took her mug in hand and sipped.
“I don’t think she believes you’re crazy. Not any more than usual, anyway. She knew it was coming.”
“But screaming down the neighborhood? Pounding on her door like that?”
“I think she knows what you’re capable of.”
“I never get in a fighting mood. She’s probably never seen me mad like that before.”
“Well, that was a day of all moods.”