The following day, my husband was over in the next town and I was free to sneak out to meet the handsome Constantine.
He was waiting for me behind the bell tower, another rose in hand. “For you, a sweet flower for my sweet Aefre,” he said as he placed it behind my ear.
I stared at him and his use of the word “sweet,” did he hear me yesterday after he left? And “my”? Oh, I would give anything to be his. My look must have portrayed this thought as he pushed off from the wall he was casually leaning against and moved so close to me again, but never touching me, always just on the fringe of my person.
“Do you want to be mine, sweet Aefre?” he asked boldly.
Recovering myself, I stammered, “I am not mine to give.”
“Alas, the lady is taken.” He looked at me with amused sorrow and asked, “Perhaps a third meeting will make her see reason?”
Wanting desperately to see him again, I said boldly, “Perhaps.”
He looked delighted. “A day from now then, I shall see you return.” He lightly touched my chin and I tilted my head up. He looked at me inquiringly and moved his mouth down to mine, barely touching my lips with his. “Good day, my lady,” he whispered with a smile so wicked I inhaled sharply. What was this man doing to me? In a flash, he was gone again. How did he do that? I wondered idly, as again I went back to the cottage and placed the rose under the bush with the other one.
Radulf was in a rage when he returned home, drunk on mead and eager to hit something, or someone. His grip on my arms was so tight, he left big black bruises and his kicks to my ribs and hips left me in tears, gasping for breath. Only thoughts of Constantine’s beautiful face kept me going.
T he next day was a usual market day and Annis and Rheda accompanied me to my disappointment. Unable to get away from my companions, I heard the bell peel. I needed to get to the tower.
Putting on my best fearful look, I whispered to Annis that I wanted to pray in the church, that I would remain unharmed that night and Annis, with pity all over her pretty face, let me go. Making haste, as fast as my battered body would let me, I stumbled into the shadow of the tower, but he wasn’t there. Catching my breath and heaving in disappointment that I missed him, I felt the tears spring to my eyes.
“Where are you?” I asked, and then turning around he was there.
“I didn’t think you were coming,” he said in a reprimand.
“I apologize, sir. I couldn’t get away from my companions,” I said, looking down fearfully at his tone.
“Always apologizing,” he said again, but in a lighter voice. I chanced a quick look up and he was lo
oking at me in puzzlement. Moving ever so close to my body again without touching me, he lifted my chin up with the rose. “Has the lady seen reason yet?”
My mouth went dry as I made the decision. I nodded.
His eyes darkened just a little bit and he narrowed them. “Do you want me, sweet Aefre?” he asked.
Still unable to speak, I nodded again, and he closed his eyes and inhaled sharply. “Where can we meet?” he asked softly.
Wetting my lips, I thought. “The old abandoned barn near my cottage. It’s just on the outskirts of the village…”
“I know where it is,” he interrupted me. “I shall see you in the hayloft when the bell strikes the hour.”
I nodded and hearing Rheda calling for me, I took my leave, wondering if my senses had left as well.
Soon after, he appeared in the barn, as he said he would. I was already in the hayloft, not having dared to go home in case I didn’t return. I didn’t want to do this, but he wanted to, and I realized then that I would do anything to please him and make him happy.
He mounted the steps with ease and stopped when he saw me. “I was of half a mind you might not be here.”
I stared at him in silence as he crossed over to me. “I am glad that you are. I have thought of nothing else since I saw you three days ago.” He undid the knot on my cloak, and it fell to the floor. I stood stock still, not knowing what to do. He moved in closer and this time brushed up against me. I tilted my head up and he kissed me. I flinched in surprise as his hands came up to my face to hold me gently. I hesitantly placed my hands on his hips, and he caught his breath at my touch. Gently pulling on my gown, he pushed it up over my head, leaving me standing in just my linen underdress. I shivered as the cold reached me and the dread of what he wanted to do to me welled up. I wanted to run, but the look in his eyes stopped me. I had never seen such beauty in a man, and I had never had anyone look at me as he was doing. With awe.
He discarded my underdress in the same manner as my gown and I drew back in fear, as I was now naked in front of him. His eyes hardened as he saw the bruises and I tried to cover them up, but he pulled my hands away.
“Please,” I begged.
He looked at me, not understanding. When he saw the evident fear in my eyes, his gaze softened and he whispered, “I would never hurt you, my sweet Aefre. You have no reason to be afraid. I shall refrain if you do not wish to continue.”
I believed that he wouldn’t hurt me, at least not intentionally, so I shook my head, “Please continue.”
He looked relieved and kissed me again, trailing his hands softly down, avoiding the bruises. I had never been touched so gently before and I started to relax under his touch. He draped our cloaks on the floor like a blanket and led me over. I knelt down. He undressed as I watched him in awe. His chest was smooth and muscular, and he had strong, lean arms and legs.