“Do it.”
“What?” I ask even though I heard my sister clearly.
“Do it. I mean, if she really can finish remotely. You do most of your work from home, so go.”
“You…you…you’re encouraging me?” I sputter.
“I am. We weren’t all popular in high school like you were—”
I let out a snort of laughter. “I wasn’t popular at all. Though once I started showing people had an odd fascination with me.”
“Oh please. Being popular is what got you knocked up in the first place and landed you the quarter back. Fuck Josh. Just not literally. Not again.”
“Ugh. I shudder. “Never ever ever again.” I shake my head, still angered when I think of Josh, who’s nothing more than a sperm donor. Looking out at our tiny yard, tears fill my eyes again. “I don’t want to mess this up, Lou. And I honestly have no idea what I’m doing.”
“You’re doing your best. Do you need me to come down tomorrow? I have a million phone calls to make and can work on the drive.”
“No, spend time with your wife before she has to leave. Though if you both want to come down here, I wouldn’t object. I do miss you guys.”
“She’s on call tomorrow and I can already promise you she’ll get called in. Shootings are a dime a dozen here in Chicago.”
“People suck. Are you sure you both don’t want to quit your jobs and live off the grid with me?”
“You know, it’s kinda tempting. But I also like my bi-weekly massages and designer shoes.”
“You can still wear designer shoes. And I’m sure you can trade services with someone else on the compound for a massage.”
“Wait, we’re going from off the grid to a compound now?”
“Yeah. I need people to help take care of all the horses I’m going to rescue. Plus, I’m a terrible gardener. Actually, since it’s my idea, I’ll just ride horses and oversee the whole operation. Oh, I’ll be the compound general manager.”
Louisa laughs. “You get this all put together and I’ll be there. Are you sure you’re okay? I really can make the drive down tomorrow.”
“Thank you, but we’ll be fine. I think…I think I’m going to pack our bags tonight and surprise Everly in the morning with a trip to Silver Ridge.”
Chapter Five
JOSIE
I pull the blankets up to Everly’s shoulders after tip-toeing into her room. She fell asleep with her phone in her hand, and I slowly slide it out of her grip. I know her passwords to everything—or at least I think I do. That was part of the deal when I allowed her to get on social media. Originally, I didn’t want her to have her own account on any sort of platform until she was sixteen but gave in when it became clear she was one of the few kids in her class who was without and she felt singled out for that.
Fuck, it’s hard to be a parent in the digital age. I understand the importance of social media just as much as I’m aware of the dangers. It’s a damned-if-you-do, damned-if-you-don’t situation. In the end, I decided it was better to give her the green light and set up something together rather than risk her sneaking it and doing God knows what behind my back.
I’ve been told to “be a mother and not a friend” over and over again, but if my own mother was more of a friend who I felt comfortable going to with private matters, I probably wouldn’t have ended up pregnant. The only sex talk I got from my parents was: “wait until marriage because it’s a sin to have sex before you’re married.” And I believed Josh when he told me I wouldn’t get pregnant if I went to the bathroom right after sex so “it would all come out.”
My parents did what they thought was best, having both been raised in strict Catholic homes themselves. And while having a pregnant teenage daughter was the last thing they expected, my parents supported and loved me throughout the whole thing. My mom took a year off from work so I could finish high school, and Everly has a great relationship with her grandparents now.
We’re lucky, I know.
Unlocking the phone, I quickly scroll through Everly’s text messages. I don’t read every one, but I’m looking for any red flags I should be aware of. There’s a fine line between respecting her privacy and knowing what’s going on for safety’s sake.
She and Alma spoke briefly about the incident at school, and then the topic switched to a book series they’re reading and how hot the main character is even though he’s “a total dick.” She hasn’t texted anyone else her age in days, and after Alma and myself, the other people she texts the most are Louisa, Nicole—my younger brother’s fiancée—and my mother.