Jewell reached out to hug her friend when Arin rose to her feet. “I knew you would want to talk to Elizabeth first.”
Arin’s teasing expression grew conflicted. “I did. Have you talked to her yet?”
“For a few minutes. She was too hysterical to make much sense.”
“When I saw her, she started crying so hard I couldn’t make much sense of it, either.” Arin bit her lip. “She doesn’t seem the same. Viper said Dr. Price gave her a sedative. I left her to get more sleep. I didn’t want to keep upsetting her.” A troubled frown marred her brow. “I feel terrible she’s gone through so much. I told her I’ll pay her salary and any counseling she needs. I’ve been paying for the apartment she was getting ready to move into …”
Jewell had known Arin too long not to recognize the same doubt that she herself had been experiencing.
“Viper told you what I said about Elizabeth’s cat?”
“Yes, but there could be a dozen explanations.”
“I know,” Jewell agreed. “That’s why I almost didn’t mention it.”
“I’ll talk to her tomorrow before I make any judgments.”
“Same here. I hope I’m wrong, but if I find out she’s been jerking you around, Elizabeth is going to need more than a sedative when I’m finished with her.”
“After I speak to her tomorrow, I’m going to the sheriff’s office to attempt to speak to her aunt. Knox says she refuses to speak to anyone other than an attorney. I’m hoping she’ll change her mind when she sees me. I’ve spoken to her several times after Elizabeth went missing.”
Jewell looked at her friend in concern. “You’ve been working too hard.”
Arin’s face nearly broke. “I’m exhausted. Hennessey is being overprotective until he and Viper can figure out who was trying to blackmail me to keep from releasing my patents. It seems whenever I try to take a step forward to really help people, I end up taking two steps back.”
Jewell placed her hand on top of Arin’s. “You’ll get there.”
The shot of confidence must have been what Arin needed as she turned her hand over to clasp hers in return. “I’ve missed you.”
“Ditto.”
Arin’s face grew troubled again. “There’s something I should have told you, but my mother told me to butt out.”
Jewell stiffened in her seat. “Is it something about my family?”
“Have you talked to your mother lately?”
“A couple of days before Christmas.” Jewell used the same mask when she played poker. “Our conversation didn’t last long. Mom doesn’t like getting caught talking to me.”
Arin’s lips tightened. “I wish you would let me introduce your dad to Hennessy; he might be able to talk some sense into him.”
“It wouldn’t do any good. Dad and I have gone past the road where we can let bygones be bygones. I’ll never forgive him for not accepting Michael.”
“I know.” Arin sighed. “Which is why I didn’t send Hennessy. You’re truly better off without him in your life. I used to envy your relationship with your dad.”
“I’ve been one disappointment after another to him. When I told him I was pregnant, it went downhill. He wanted me to make his construction business my life, like it was his. I could feel his attitude toward me change. I wanted to keep the baby, but it was argument after argument until he threw me out. After my brothers’ deaths, he turned the grief he felt into hatred for me. I can’t blame him. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t hate myself for the same reason.”
Jewell tightened her hand on Arin’s when she opened her mouth to protest. “If I had stayed home and worked for my father, they would still be alive.”
“You would have never had Michael,” Arin whispered sadly.
“If I had made the right decision to move home, Dad would have eventually accepted Michael,” Jewell reasoned.
“You don’t know that. You could still have lost Michael and your brothers in a different accident.”
“Maybe so, but perhaps I wouldn’t have felt so responsible.”
“Jewell, I was blessed to see you with Michael before you lost him. You would have blamed yourself regardless. You’re not the type of person who could accept losing someone close to your heart. Like Rocky, you have the heart of a fighter.”
“Rocky isn’t real. He’s a character in a movie.”
“Art mimics reality. Jewell, you give a hundred and ten percent in everything you do. Sometimes, our best isn’t good enough. I have to live with that reality every day … Do you know how much I wish I could come up with a cure for cancer or over a thousand different diseases people suffer with every day? I can’t, but that doesn’t mean the effort I put into it isn’t worth the fight.”
Jewell felt as if she carried the responsibility of her son and brothers’ deaths in her heart, while Arin felt responsible for untold deaths every day because she couldn’t come up with a cure. If she looked at Arin as a warrior, then by the same token, she had to see herself the same way.