“I trust them. I don’t trust you.”
“I’ve never lied to you, Sam. Can they say the same?”
And if that wasn’t just a kick in the nuts. “How do I know that’s true?”
“I’ve never had any reason to. Sam, I have a vested interest in seeing the world remain as it is. These people are my people. I am the phuro because they placed their faith in me. And it is my duty to protect them at all costs. Why would I lie, especially if it meant harm could come to them? I would sacrifice myself if
it meant the darkness would not fall upon them. They are not meant to live in shadow. The gypsies are meant to bask in the sun.”
“You told them that Ruv was my cornerstone,” I said through gritted teeth, trying to hold on to any semblance of truth that I could. “You knew full well that I would never accept him. That I had Ryan. That I would always have Ryan.”
“I am the phuro,” she said again. “I would protect them. But it also means I am a politician. I curried their favor toward you. They allowed their prejudices to cloud their eyes. I gave you the chance to be seen in a different light. I did what I did for you.”
“You really believe that.”
“Yes.”
“And what will you do when they realize I will never be with Ruv?”
“You seem sure about that, chava.”
I banged my fist on her desk. She didn’t even flinch. “I am sure about it.”
“Well, then,” she said. “I will have lied. And I will deal with the fallout. But tell me, Sam. How can you know what the future holds? You cannot see as I have.”
I stood. The chair scraped along the wooden floor. “We leave,” I said, “in the morning. Me. Ryan. Gary. Tiggy. Kevin. That is it.”
“And the desert dragon?”
“Will remain where he is until I’m ready for him.”
“And how will you know when you’re ready?”
“When I have them all.”
“So you have accepted your destiny because of what I’ve shown you.”
I leaned forward, my hands on the desk. “No. Not because of what you’ve shown me. Because it’s the godsdamned right thing to do. I don’t know what you’re after, Vadoma. But you would do well to stay out of my way.”
She laughed. It grated against my ears. “Oh, Sam. You truly are beyond what I had hoped for. But I must remind you again: I have never lied to you. Can you name someone else in your life that can say the same?”
“I don’t have to answer to you.”
Her eyes narrowed. “Do you know who I am? Who you’re talking to?”
I grinned sharply at her. “Do you? Because I’m Sam of Wilds. I’m the apprentice to the King’s Wizard. And I will do whatever it takes to keep those I love safe.”
“Your cockiness will be your undoing,” she said. “The power you wield will not protect you from everything.”
“It’s a start,” I retorted. “And I’ll figure out the rest. I mean it, Vadoma. Back. Off.”
I turned and walked away without looking back.
I was glad she wasn’t able to hear the racing of my heart.
I HATED to admit that, above all else, Vadoma had made a good point. It was easier being in Mashallaha when the people there weren’t being racist fucktards. It didn’t exactly endear them to me to see how fickle they could be with their affections. That night, as the celebration went on, it was like their previous actions had never happened. They smiled at me. They laughed around me. Men and women grabbed me by the hand and pulled me out to dance, spinning around and around as dresses and feet were kicked up. I had garlands of flowers placed around my neck, beads tied into my hair. They treated me as if I was one of them, as if I belonged.
If this had happened at the beginning, maybe things would have been different. But they hadn’t, and I saw through it for what it was: a farce.