I frowned. “That doesn’t sound like a very nice thing to say.”
“I know. Please don’t tell her I said it. She scares me.”
“It’ll stay between us.” I glared at the Darks. “Right?”
“Right,” the Darks said.
The portly Dark said, “Sam of Dragons? That’s… okay, that’s actually pretty darn impressive. Dang it. I was hoping it’d be something dumb, and then we could all make fun of you and be like, oh, look at this dork. His name is so stupid.”
I nodded sympathetically. “Yeah. That might have been good if my wizarding name wasn’t so hard-core. Like, I mean. It’s Sam. Of Dragons, you know? You really can’t get much better than that. Especially since I actually have an actual dragon and you guys have… what.”
“I have a bo staff,” one of the Darks said, pulling said bo staff off his back.
“Wow,” I said. “That’s—that’s just nice.”
“Thanks. It’s actually a stick I found in the woods, but. It’s… big? I guess. So I tell people it’s a bo staff.”
“Do they believe it?”
Another Dark scoffed. “Not at all.”
“I like it, Brad. You don’t see me making fun of your stuff.”
“That’s because all of my stuff is great, Neil. I don’t go through the woods and say, oh what do you know, here’s a big stick I found on the ground and I’m going to take it with me and tell people it’s a bo staff.”
“Brad,” the portly Dark said. “We talked about this. Neil can do what he likes, because he earned it by locating the Resistance in Old Clearing and reporting it back to us. If he wants to use his reward to pick up a stick—excuse me, a bo staff—then that’s his right.”
“Thank you,” Neil said. “I’m getting better at it.” He attempted to twirl the stick but ended up hitting himself in the face. “Oops! Okay, it’s a work in progress, but I’ll figure it out.”
“Yeah,” I said. “That’s just swell.” I clapped my hands. “So! I’ve introduced myself. You’ve told me some things about you. Like, Neil and his bo staff. Or Brad being a jerk.”
“Hey!”
“And you’ve met my friend Kevin here,” I continued. “I think that’s pretty much all we need to know about each other. I guess that leaves just one more thing. A choice!”
The portly Dark frowned. “Choice?”
I nodded sagely. “Yes. A choice. You can either turn around and start running, and then keep on running until you are out of Verania where no one knows who you are. And you’ll need to promise to never harm another living soul ever again.”
“That sounds like a lot of work,” Neil said. “I mean, I get what you’re trying to say, but that’s so much running.”
“Yep,” I agreed. “It is. But it might be better than the alternative.”
“Which is?” Brad asked snidely, and I decided I hated him.
I grinned at him. He flinched. It made me happy. “Thank you for asking, Brad. The alternative is that Kevin and myself kick your collective asses and then take you to Randall, who’s waiting back there at the gate—ah! I can see by the looks on your faces that you know that name really well. Yes, Randall is here, and he is not in a good mood.” I didn’t know if that was true, but it was Randall, and he usually looked pissed off. “So, choice is yours, my dudes.”
“There’s only two of you,” Brad said, full of bravado. I hoped he chose to fight, because I wanted to punch him.
“One of whom is a dragon. But yes. You’re right.”
Brad had less bravado then. “And Randall is old and way back by the gate.”
“Oh, Brad. Brad, Brad, Brad. You’re not sounding like you’re going to make the right choice here.”
Then, quicker than I expected, a fucking fireball hurtled toward me, bright and hot and burning the air around it as it flew at my head. I held my hand out in front and the fireball stopped, hovering in the air inches away from my palm.
“Neil,” I said, a little startled. “I didn’t expect that to come from you. I thought we were friends. You’ve chosen… poorly.”