“You she-witch,” I growled, taking a step toward her. “I know what you’re doing. Mark my words, you shall face my wrath.”
“But, Sam,” Lady Tina said, voice sticky sweet, “I don’t know what our Prince and Knight Commander would do without me. I am their second, after all.”
“Ahh,” the crowd said.
We were now almost toe to toe.
She smelled like flowery perfume.
And evil.
“I don’t know your game here,” I snarled at her quietly. “But trust me when I say I’ll figure it out. And when I do, you shall rue the day you set eyes upon me. You hear me? So. Much. Ruing.”
“Oh, Sam,” she said, eyes blazing. “There is no game. I’ve changed. I’m a different person now, one who has seen the error of her ways. You haven’t been around to see my transformation. Where I was once a beautiful caterpillar, I have now been transformed into a magnificent butterfly capable of dealing death.”
“Well, I’m a—wait. Hold on. Butterflies can’t kill people. That’s just stupid. You’re dumb. Everything about you is dumb.”
“Oh my gods,” a woman in the crowd moaned. “The sexual tension is so palpable. Why can’t they just kiss already? SilvaHeart for life!”
“Ew,” Tina and I both said at the same time.
“Like I would ever,” I snapped.
“Have you seen him?” she growled. “He’s so… not attractive. And at least I seem to the only one out of the two of us to understand basic hygiene.”
“I told you I’ve been living in the woods. In a hut.”
“Ooh, bully for you. The great Sam of Wilds has—”
“Sam of Dragons, actually.”
The crowd gasped dramatically.
“Still not disappointed!” that first voice called out again. “In fact, I am so far from disappointed, it’s ridiculous!”
Tina’s expression faltered as she took a step back. There was a flicker of fear on her face, and I relished it.
“Oh, you hadn’t heard,” I said. “Funny, that.” I puffed out my chest and jutted my chin. “I was tasked by the gods with a destiny. I have met that task with no complaints—”
“Well, that’s certainly not true in the slightest,” Kevin said mildly.
“—with no complaints, and have collected the dragons of Verania. And as I entered—”
“Of which I am one!” Kevin proclaimed. “Lord Dragon has returned. You may bestoweth upon me all of your possessions in gratitude. So spaketh the Beast from the East. Eth!”
“Would you stop interrupting me? I’m trying to be cool here.”
“Key word trying,” Kevin muttered under his breath.
“What was that?”
“Nothing, nothing. Keep going. You’re really doing well.”
“Thank you.”
“For an insignificant speck of dust.”
“Hey!”