“You’re blushing,” I said in awe. “Why are you blushing!”
“Oh my God,” Kori whispered. “No. Fucking. Way.”
Charlie’s eyes went wide as he looked at Kori.
“Are you being ser
ious right now?” she demanded.
He licked his lips. Glanced back at me. Looked back at Kori. Then nodded.
“You sly old bastard!” she shrieked.
“What is happening!” I shouted, not even caring that everyone was looking at us.
“Keep your voices down,” Charlie hissed. “We’re in public.”
“I can’t believe you hid this from us,” Kori said, pulling out her phone. “I am going to tell so many people, you don’t even know. I’m going to tell people I don’t even know. I don’t care. Everyone needs to hear this. This might be the greatest thing that’s ever happened. Paul, your wedding is a close second.”
“Everyone does not need to hear this,” Charlie said, deftly plucking her phone from her hands as she squawked at him.
“Hear what?” I said, exasperated.
Charlie sighed. “I need to change the invitation. To a plus-one. I’m… bringing. Someone. With me.”
“What,” I said. Because what.
“It’s not a big deal,” Charlie said, sounding defensive.
“Um, yeah it is,” I said. “You have a secret boyfriend. In what world is that not a big deal? Also, Kori, I was about to fucking stab you in the eye for saying my wedding was second for you behind this, but now that I know what’s going on, I totally agree.”
“Thank you, Paul.”
“That being said, if you ever say my wedding day is second again, I will sell your organs on the black market.”
“Understood, Paul.”
Before I turned back to look at Charlie, I gave Kori a complicated series of movements with my eyebrows, suggesting that she allow me to take the lead on this. She responded in kind, telling me she would be my backup. We’d perfected this during the days of Good Cop, Bad Cop, Corrupt Cop when the whole Darren and Sandy debacle had occurred. Well, most of us had perfected this. Vince just kept bursting into laughter every time I tried to talk to him with my eyebrows. He was such a lost cause.
We turned slowly back to Charlie, who folded his arms across his chest, looking like he was having none of our shit.
“Hi, Daddy,” I said.
“Boy,” he responded, the warning evident in his voice.
“So, how are you?”
“Really. That’s what you’re starting with.”
“Doing good?”
“Yes, Paul. I’m good.”
“That’s nice to hear.” I smiled at him to let him know we were all friends here and that he had nothing to worry about. “So, anything you want to talk about?”
“Jesus Christ,” he muttered.
“Ain’t nobody talking about our lord and savior right now, funny man,” Kori said, eyes wide. “Maybe cut the shit and get on with it.”