‘Ethan...’ She knew exactly where he was going with this. That delicious state, somewhere in between relaxation and tension which was beyond any words. He did it so well.
There was only now. Only his touch. Everything else faded into soft focus as he ran his tongue along the inside of her thigh.
* * *
The bed rocked in response to urgent movement. Kate’s eyes snapped open and then she squeezed them shut against the light. Ethan’s warmth beside her had suddenly been snatched away and it felt as if he’d taken a part of her with it.
‘I’m sorry.’ She heard his voice, full of regret and panic. Opening her eyes, she focussed on the clock. She’d set the alarm for seven, and they must have both slept through it.
‘I’m so sorry, sweetheart. I have to go.’ Ethan had dressed in less time that it had taken her to realise what day it was.
She wanted to grab him, pull him back into bed with her. Tell him that Sam would be okay with his grandparents. Have Ethan make love to her for another hour. But that wasn’t possible and, even if it had been, Kate wouldn’t have done it. She’d known about this going in, and now was no time to complain.
‘It’s all right. I know.’
He was already making for the door, and she felt a tightness in her chest, the prelude to tears. At least he wouldn’t see them. He’d be gone in a moment. But Ethan turned, striding back towards the bed.
‘I wish I could stay.’ He wrapped his arms around her, kissing her forehead.
‘I wish you could stay too. But you have to go and get Sam. Go...’
All the tenderness, all the passion from last night, was still in his eyes. One last look, and then he stood. This time he didn’t turn back.
Kate heard his footsteps on the stairs and the quiet sound of the front door closing. Outside in the lane, a car engine burst into life.
She reached for her diary, flipping through to find the first blank page. She already knew the best and worst things that could possibly happen to her today.
Best: making love with Ethan.
Kate paused, wondering whether she should elaborate. But that pretty much said it all.
Worst: when he left.
She snapped the diary closed, throwing it down on the bed. Now that she was awake, she might as well get up and get on with the day.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
KATE LOOKED AT her phone. Ethan had called every day for the last four days, just to talk for half an hour after he’d put Sam to bed, and there was no reason why she shouldn’t call him. It was half-past nine and he must be alone by now.
Her hands were shaking as she flipped through her contacts list. Maybe she could call Usha instead. But, although Usha had said she could call at any time, Kate didn’t want to disturb her at this time in the evening.
‘Ethan?’
‘Hey there, beautiful. I was about to call you.’
‘Sam’s asleep?’ Why was she whispering? Probably because Ethan was, but then he had to think about not waking Sam. Last night their whispered conversation had seemed delicious, but tonight it felt as if she was doing something wrong by calling him.
‘Yes, finally.’ There was a moment’s silence on the line. ‘Is anything the matter?’
How quickly things changed. On the night she’d been mugged, he’d tried to comfort her and she’d pushed him away. Tonight, she wanted him to hold her, but he couldn’t.
‘I fell asleep on the sofa. I...had a nightmare.’
‘Sweetheart...’ Ethan’s voice seemed very far away. ‘I wish I could be there.’
She wished that too. ‘It’s okay. I just wanted to hear your voice.’
‘I’d rather...’ He left the thought unfinished. Ethan knew as well as she did that there was no point in talking about what couldn’t happen right now. ‘You haven’t had a nightmare in a while.’