“N…no. Of…of course not. I understand.” When she removes the piece of jewelry from the bag, she gasps, and her hands fly to her mouth. “Oh my god! Toren! I…I can’t take this! This is…this is…do you know how hard these are to find? How collectible?”
My grin grows so wide that it could crack my face in half. “I can imagine. I wanted to find you something really neat, something no one else would have. I started looking around online. I…It came a few days ago. The shipping was very fast.”
“But these things belong in collections of rich people. Private collections.” She turns the piece over. “It’s definitely original….” She hesitates, but I can see how much she loves it. “Are you sure? You really want me to have this?”
“Yes! I’m a hundred percent sure. And I want you to wear it.”
It’s a pin or brooch-type thing, and I think what I got is called an eye miniature. Apparently, in the past, people gave these things to each other as gifts. It was their lover’s eye painted, but just the eye, so only they would know whose eye it was. Ones with pearls meant the lover had died, but this one doesn’t have pearls since I thought that was too morbid and sad. And maybe a tad creepy. Instead, this thing looks like something out of a sci-fi movie. It was the strangest thing I came across when looking for unique, antique jewelry.
“I…I love it,” Luna breathes, holding the piece with reverence. “It’s incredible. This is a once-in-a-lifetime piece. I don’t know what to say.”
“I was going to ask you if you’d be open to a second chance. To giving me one, that is. After Tuesday, I’ve been thinking about it. A lot. I wanted to get you something, but now I don’t feel like it’s the right time to ask. I feel like you’ll see it as a bribe or something, but honestly, the gift comes with no strings attached. And I can wait however long you want. I’d do anything, though, Lu, to prove I’m worthy of the second chance and you. I was without you for five years, and they were the longest years of my life. If my Granny hadn’t meddled, I would still be plodding on, getting through each day, just existing. People talk about never living, and that’s what I was doing. I was so dumb, so blind, and so silly. I definitely had my head up my ass so far that I…anyway. I know I don’t deserve it, but I will work my buttocks off every single day to prove I’m worthy of you. I promise that if you put your trust in me, I will never break it again. I will be the man I should have been five years ago. I will bring joy to your life instead of being a shitbag who’s dragging you down. But if you don’t want to, I get it. I know that with Milo, things are complicated, and we both want what’s best for him. I’m all in if you want to be. Or I can be all out and just be Milo’s dad. I just…that Tuesday…I thought that…Wow. I’m just going to shut it now since I’m rambling, and rambling is never good. I’m just embarrassing myself over here.”
Luna clutches the brooch in her one hand. She’s still amazed, but it’s me she’s looking at now. I don’t feel worthy of her expression, amazement, and adoration.
“I’ve thought about it too,” she whispers. She sniffles after and has to wipe her eyes again.
Good gravy, I think I might have a speck of dust in my eyes as well. And a sock jammed down my throat. Strange how allergies work like that. Or maybe it’s the stifling humidity outdoors. Dang it, NOLA, you’re killing us.
“I’ve thought about it a lot,” she says, sniffling again. “Not just these past few weeks but over the past years. I’ve thought of a thousand scenarios. I promised myself that if you ever asked sincerely and truly meant it, no matter how hurt, angry, or doubtful I was, I’d say yes.”
“Are you serious?”
She nods. “We’d have to take it slow. Very, very slow and cautiously, making sure Milo is always okay. But god, Tor, I’ve missed you.”
I want to cling to that, I really do, but there’s something else, something more I have to say. Something I’ve never told anyone. I need her to understand as much as what I did could be understood. “I need you to understand, Lu. My whole life, I was afraid I’d become my father. It’s why I…why I did what I did. I saw myself falling in love with you, marrying you, being so freaking happy. And then I saw myself fucking it all up, wrecking it, wrecking us. Just like he did to my mom. I…I have his genes, and he’s a part of me. I knew it would have all gone wrong at some point.”