That was around the time I met Tani and started babysitting. I emailed Carol every day. Then every week. Then twice a month. I was a teenage boy and she seemed happy. I should have been paying more attention.
“I saw her graduate from high school. By that time, I had some money and her parents were struggling, so I helped send her to college. I was proud of myself. I’d kept my promise and we had our whole lives ahead of us. I had no idea that there were problems. She never told me she’d been in therapy or that she’d tried to hurt herself before. No one did. I only found out after her funeral last year.”
My words land like shattered glass in the quiet car. “She wrote a one-line goodbye for me in the letter she left for her parents.”
Thank you for trying to keep me safe. I’m glad you got away. I know now I never did.
“Joey, I—”
“I didn’t say this for that.” I push his hand and the shadows away. “I haven’t shared her with anyone because I don’t want to talk about it. Not with Tani. Not with my parents. They knew I had a rough time, but my relationship with Carol was my secret and, in a lot of ways, the inspiration for my career.
I think I’m telling you so you take me seriously now. So when I say you don’t need to worry about being a good father, you can be sure I mean it and I know what I’m talking about. I’ve experienced the good, the bad and the apathetic when it comes to father figures. The way you fight for her, the way you stopped everything to come for her? Your mother was wrong. You made the right decision.”
“Jesus, Joey.” He rubs the back of his neck, concern filling his expression. “I’m glad you told me. I can’t tell you how much, but you’re giving me too much credit.” “I don’t think I am.”
“What you’ve been through? Rue was never in any danger of that. There were good people around her. The chef she told you about? Those friends who showed me pictures? They were all ready to take Rue in. All surprised when the lawyer read the will. Even the lawyer was worried I wasn’t up for the job. He’d known them since they were kids, and all he saw when he looked at me was a man without roots. An irresponsible ballplayer who knocked a woman up and disappeared.”
He shook his head. “But none of that mattered as soon as I saw that little girl. She recognized me from the picture her mother had framed for her, called me Daddy, and I swear my heart lit up for the first time in my life. Like I’d been missing a piece for years without knowing it, and there she was. The perfect fit. It was more selfishness than anything else. I needed her, you know? It wasn’t the other way around. And there was no way I was leaving her behind.”
“We’re here,” Derek says, suddenly sounding heavily congested. “Call me when you need a ride home. I don’t care what time it is.”
I think we broke my driver. I pat him on the shoulder as I scoot across the seat behind Elliot. “Thanks, D. That got heavier than expected, I know, but you handled it like a pro. You’re a good man.”
“Mr. Redmond?”
“Joey.”
“Joey,” he repeats, shocking the hell out of me. “I’m proud to be on your team. Sir.”
“Don’t make me cry in front of my new drinking buddy or I’m picking out the next car, and it will be a purple station wagon.”
I hear his wet chuckle as I close the door behind me and look at Elliot. “Beer?”
His affirmative nod is decisive. “Hell yeah. All the beer.”
Chapter Nine
Joey
Beer was the right call.
I’m loving everything about this decision, from the conversation to the atmosphere. But for the first time since I started visiting my brother before I decided to move here, I’m grateful that I don’t see anyone I recognize at the pub. This is already the best date I’ve ever had.
Not a date.
Whatever. I’m not going to analyze it into the ground tonight. All that would do is kill my buzz.
When we entered the bar, Elliot wore his baseball cap and pulled it down over his eyes. He tensed every time someone glanced our way and I realized he was worried about being recognized. I’ve seen those Costner movies, so I know athletes are basically rock stars, and I understood why he was wary. But we wouldn’t have any fun until he relaxed, so I went ahead and introduced him to Ransom’s Beard.
Yes. His beard has its own Instagram account. And since the most recent post claimed that “he” was currently taking some time for himself in New Zealand, no one would be looking for him here.