DEREK SOUNDED GUARDED when he answered his phone. He obviously knew Summer was the caller.
Now that she had him on the line, she wasn’t sure what she’d wanted to say. “Derek, it’s Summer,” she told him after a short pause.
“I thought it might be,” he answered, confirming her guess. “Are you okay?”
The concern in his voice made her blink back a rush of tears. She hadn’t cried this much in five years, she told herself impatiently. “I’m fine, Derek. Are you?”
“I’m sitting here staring into a double Scotch and wondering if I should have refused to take you home tonight,” he answered flatly. “I’d like to be holding you instead of this glass. What happened, Summer?”
“I panicked,” she admitted softly. “I just panicked. Things got too serious, and I couldn’t think of a joke to lighten the mood, so I ran.”
“That’s what I thought,” he murmured. “Summer, why did you go to bed with me tonight?”
She couldn’t speak for a moment as the words jammed in her throat, then she forced herself to answer. “That’s why I called, Derek. There was something I wanted to tell you.”
There was a pause, and then he spoke tonelessly, as if dreading her answer but wanting to get it over with. “What is it, Summer?”
How vulnerable he was, Summer thought in bemusement. As vulnerable as she. She had been unintentionally cruel to him tonight. “I forgot to tell you that I love you, Derek. I think I have from the beginning.”
When the pause at the other end threatened to turn into minutes, she asked anxiously, “Derek, did you hear me?”
“I heard you, Summer,” he finally answered. “Did you just realize this?”
“No. I knew it even before we made love. I just wouldn’t admit it.”
“Then why did you put me through hell tonight?” Derek demanded in frustration. “What are you doing there when you should be here, in my bed? I thought you were trying to let me down easy because you didn’t love me and didn’t think you ever could.”
“Derek, I never knew I could love anyone like this. But I still think you need time,” she added hastily.
“Me? You were giving me time?” he asked incredulously. “Summer, I know how I feel. I’m not confused by my feelings for you. Forgive me for being blunt, darling, but I’ve known physical desire before and I’ve never confused great sex for anything more than it was. Tonight wasn’t sex, Summer. Tonight was love.”
“Oh, Derek, I want so much to believe that. I still think you should take time to think about what a relationship with me would involve. It would take compromise and lots of time because we really are different in some ways. I am lame, and I just can’t promise that I’ll be on time to everything or plan my days or weeks according to some schedule or—”
“Summer.” Derek interrupted her gently, his voice sounding considerably lighter than it had when he’d answered the telephone. “Do you love me?”
“Yes, Derek, I love you.”
“Then we’ll work it out,” he told her confidently. “Dammit, Summer, why didn’t you stay and talk to me instead of leaving me to think you didn’t love me?”
“I’m sorry.”
“You should be. I don’t know if I’m going to spank you or throw you to the floor and ravish you the next time I see you.”
“Do I have a choice?” she asked with an attempt at humor.
“No. I think I’ll let you worry about it. You deserve it. Will I see you tomorrow?”
Summer took a deep breath. “No, Derek. I still want you to take this week to think about us. Think about everything I’ve said and whether it’s worth it to you to make some sacrifices and compromises. If you decide that I’m not right for you after all, I’ll… I’ll try to understand.” She’d die, she thought, but she didn’t voice that glum thought.
Derek growled very distinctly into the receiver. “You are driving me slowly insane, Summer Reed. The biggest obstacle I can see between us right now is your stubborn refusal to give me a chance to convince you that we can overcome the other obstacles. I’ll take the damned week if you insist, but it’s not going to change a thing. I’m old enough and experienced enough to know what I’m feeling and to understand what is involved here. Dammit, woman, I love you, and I’m going to convince you of that if it kills us both.”
Summer laughed softly, reluctantly. “I’m beginning to believe you.”
“Good. I’m the guy who always gets what he’s after, remember?”
“I love you, Derek.”
“I love you; Summer. Let me prove it to you.”