“The Book of Debt isn’t fake, Pie. It does keep track. And it’s honest.”
She does a half-hearted shrug. “It’s not likely, Pell.”
“You want me to prove that true too?”
“How?”
“Simple.” I find myself grinning. “All you have to do is please me and watch your debt disappear in real time.” I pull into the sanctuary’s back lot, park the Jeep, and turn it off.
And when I look at her, I realize she’s suspicious of me again, all my goodwill suddenly erased. “You want me to wash your feet, Pell? Like a fucking slave?”
“That’s just one way.”
“You want me to—”
I point at her. “Do not say ‘blowjob.’ I will stop talking to you forever. I’m not a bad guy. I didn’t write that book. I didn’t make up these rules. I didn’t have anything to do with it. I’m stuck here, just like you.”
She lets out a long breath. “Then how? If not feet, if not…” I caution her with my eyes. “If not that other thing, then how?”
“You could polish my horns. No one’s done it in a very long time. They could use it.”
She actually checks my horns for dullness and I have to cover my mouth with my fist to hide my amusement. Is she slow? Is she crazy? Is she naïve?
Or is she just cute?
“And this will knock a debt off?” Pie seems dubious.
“A nice chunk,” I say. “I like the horn polish. A lot. It feels good. Like a back massage. And the debts are erased according to how much you please me.”
“Why is it like that?”
“Why is it like what?”
“Why does this curse care about your… pleasure?”
“Huh.” I think about that for a moment. I feel like I know the answer to this, but I can’t quite conjure it up. “I dunno. I can’t remember.”
“Well, it feels like a plot device to me. It feels… fake.”
“For fuck’s sake. None of this is fake. You’re wearing the ring. You’re trapped here. The gray mist. The apothecary. Fucking Tomas! It’s all real.”
She exhales loudly, not looking at me, just focusing on something outside by the lake for a few moments. “Did Grant ever polish your horns?”
“Never. I didn’t let him touch me. That’s probably why he thinks it doesn’t work. All he ever did was cook for me. And in the beginning, we used to go drinking. And he’d glamour me. He knows that worked. So all that shit he talked to you, that’s all it was. Just shit. He’s a fucking liar.”
“I don’t know. He seems to be in control of things.”
“In control of what?”
She turns her head to look me in the eyes. Her eyes are a very pretty blue color. Like cornflowers. And somehow, maybe the moon is reflecting off the lake or something, but her eyes are lit up with a little glow. “He wasn’t old, Pell. He was young when I saw him in town. He looked exactly the way he did when I first saw him. Before he took the ring off. He knows things. And he’s in control of things.”
“How?”
Pie, of course, has no answer for me.
“I mean… that’s not possible. He had debts. He had so much debt, Pie. It would’ve taken centuries to wipe it away.”
“It’s an easy explanation,” Pie says. “That book is bullshit.”
“No.” I’m shaking my head. “You saw him get old.” I look at her for confirmation and she nods. “So it’s not bullshit. The debt caught up. He got out of it. But how?”
“I think he really does do magic, Pell. Like…” She sucks in a breath and then blows it out with her words. “Like big, bad, serious magic. He said he had a spell. He offered it to me. He told me how to make money. He said I could stay for as long as I wanted, make money on the outside, and then he could call up a new caretaker with another flyer when I was ready to leave.”
My mouth drops open. “What did you say?”
“I told him to shove it up his ass. Sorta. But I’m not interested in getting rich off this curse. That’s such a bad idea. And I don’t want to leave. Not yet. And anyway, we already know where another caretaker is. Russ Roth is my ticket out if I ever do want to go.”
I knew Grant was powerful, of course. He’s been very busy in that apothecary for decades. And the greenhouse is—I point at Pie. “At some point, sooner rather than later, remind me to show you the greenhouse. Maybe he fucked that all up too, but I doubt it. He didn’t know when you would come. I mean, did he know you were coming?”
“No. He was surprised. And all the way across the sanctuary. He was so out of breath when he finally found me in that front hall, he could barely talk.”