“I was supposed to be here.” She shakes her head. “And then Bianca said if I didn’t go tonight, I would be fired.” Even in the darkness, I can see her throat move as she attempts to swallow her guilt down.
“I was on a date while she was trying to kill herself. I should’ve been here.” She nods once to no one in particular then finally makes eye contact with me. “If you can let me use your phone, I can call for a cab. Thank you for calling the ambulance. When I found my mom, her phone was floating in the toilet. And when I tried to dial 911 from mine, it wouldn’t even turn on. I didn’t realize my phone was dead. I must’ve forgotten to charge it. I don’t know what I would’ve done if you weren’t still here.”
“You don’t have to thank me. I’m just glad I hadn’t left yet. I’m not letting you call for a car. Let’s go.” Gently, I grip her wrist and guide her to Nick’s BMW. Thankfully, she gets in without arguing, and we head to the hospital.
Ten
Giselle
The entire drive to the hospital is spent with me silently working myself up. My mom is dead. How could she not be? As I held her in my arms, I couldn’t find a pulse. I couldn’t feel any air coming from her nose. Her body was limp and she was white as a ghost. I don’t work in the medical field but it doesn’t take a doctor to know the odds are stacked against her. I have no idea how many pills she swallowed or how long ago she swallowed them. It’ll be a miracle if I’m told she’s alive. I should call my sister and tell her what’s going on, but I can’t do it. Isn’t telling your younger sister your mom is dead something that should be done in person?
This is all my fault. I should’ve gone straight to her the minute Dedra said she had to leave. It doesn’t matter that she’s been happier lately. Laughing and smiling. I know that at any given moment she can sink back into her depression. I shouldn’t have chanced it. Her life should’ve been more important than my job. More important than money. But the job and the money is how you take care of her…
Killian parks Nick’s car, and I jump out, heading straight through the emergency room entrance. I find the front desk and give the nurse my mom’s name. After she confirms who I am, I’m told she’s been put into the system and is being worked on.
“She’s not dead?” I ask.
The nurse’s lips twist into something between a frown and a sad smile. “I’m not sure,” she admits. “It doesn’t give me any information. I’ve notated you’re here, and as soon as there’s any information you’ll be called.”
I thank her and have a seat. Killian sits next to me. I should tell him he can go, but I don’t. As strange as it may seem, it feels nice having him here with me. He’s the only person aside from my dad and sister who has seen my mom at her worst. And while he’s said some pretty shitty stuff to me, he’s never said a single mean thing about my mom.
I’m not sure how long we sit here, but at some point, his hand makes its way into mine and my head makes its way onto his shoulder. My thoughts go back to last week when I wished for a man’s shoulder to put my head on. My eyes close and my body shuts down temporarily, needing a tiny moment of reprieve from the onslaught of emotions that are weighing down on me.
“Giselle.” I hear my name being whispered. I open my eyes and lift my head to find Killian softly smiling at me. “The doctor is here to speak to you.” My body shoots up too quickly and everything goes fuzzy. Killian’s hands grip my waist, and I steady myself.
“Thank you,” I whisper then step closer toward the doctor.
“Next of Kin to Sarah Winters?” he asks.
“Yes, I’m her daughter.” I extend my hand to shake his and he takes it.
“I’m Dr. Goldberg. As I’m sure you’re aware, your mother overdosed on prescription drugs. We were able to pump her stomach in time. We have her in a drug-induced coma and will slowly lower the dosage. I’m going to strongly suggest you have her Baker Acted.”
“What’s Baker Acted?” I ask.
“It’s when you sign off on your mom to be held for up to seventy-two hours for involuntary examination.”
“Like being committed?” I question.
“Yes, the doctors will be able to assess her more thoroughly. The form you filled out indicated she’s been on several different types of prescriptions over the years. My guess is she’s seen different psychiatrists who have diagnosed her to the best of their ability, but my recommendation is to have her evaluated more thoroughly. With this suicidal attempt, plus the scars on her wrists, which indicate this isn’t her first attempt to commit suicide, and add in the different diagnoses, they may even recommend she stay longer.”