I got up and sat beside him, peering at his phone.
“Okay, so you get six pictures and an ‘About’ section. Easy enough.”
“But I don’t know what pictures to use and what to write,” he said, looking at me bashfully.
“Well, you want pictures that express who you are.”
“I have one of me at this year’s Comic Book Convention. I’m dressed up as Aquaman, it’s a rad costume!”
I tried not to giggle.
“Um, you might want to pick something else. Not all girls are into comics.”
His face fell like a droopy hound dog.
“Aww, why? I look really good.” And quickly, he pulled up the photo to show me.
Unfortunately, Jim did not look good. The orange shirt and green only emphasized his doughy body, highlighting every lump and weird bulge.
“Do you have any pictures where you’re at work?” I asked pragmatically. “Girls love animals. So if you say you work at an animal clinic, that’s sure to attract some women.”
“Maybe,” he mumbled, still disappointed. But Jim began browsing through the photos on his camera.
I stopped him before he could swipe past one where he was hugging a golden retriever. “This one!”
Jim made a face.
“What? Really? But I look so lame. Are you sure that I shouldn’t put up the Aquaman one?”
I sighed, rolling my eyes discreetly.
“Trust me on this one. This one’s amazing.”
Jim looked hesitant but nonetheless posted the picture to his LoveSwipe profile.
“Alright, anything else?” he asked.
“Hmm, let me see.” I took his phone and selected five more pictures, doing my best to make him look like a good guy. Girls liked that, and it’d only be a matter of time before he got a few matches, I was sure.
Maybe then he would finally stop clinging to me. Not that I was trying to get rid of him or anything. He was a good enough friend.
“Okay, so now what do I write?”
Jim turned puppy dog eyes to me for guidance, fingers hovering over the keyboard, ready to type anything I said.
“Hmm. Well, introduce yourself. Explain some of your –“ I stopped myself mid-sentence. Any girl who realized he was obsessed with video games would probably swipe past his profile. “Actually, just let me do it.”
As I crafted the perfect bio, Jim looked over my shoulder for a moment before turning away uninterested. He fiddled with his coffee cup for a moment before turning back to me.
“Why aren’t you dating?” was his question, eyeing my curiously. “What happened to that guy anyways? You know, your ex?”
I stopped typing and sighed.
“I’m going through a divorce. You know that, Jim.” My voice was harsher than I intended, but still. Why did he constantly ask me the same question? I was sick of it. Sure, six months had gone by since Mason dumped me, but that didn’t mean I was over him.
Hell, I didn’t know if I would ever get over him.
Because how could I?
Before old emotions could resurface, I bit my lip, holding them back.
Jim frowned. “Yeah.” He nodded. “That guy was terrible.” He toyed with the cap on his cup, fingers idle.
“What were you thinking, Laney, marrying a convicted felon?”
Instantly, my jaw clenched as anger bubbled inside my chest. My fingers tightened around his phone, breathing going fast, and then slow.
“He’s not a convicted felon,” came my strangled voice. “Not anymore. Mason won his appeal, and his record is clean now.” I defended my ex, voice coming out harsh and cold.
Jim shook his head, his frown deepening. I could tell that he pitied me, like the fat girl who’d been pranked by the prom king and his football buddies.
And I hated it.
“I don’t know about you,” said Jim airily, “but I don’t believe that an innocent man would get thrown in jail. When you’re that high-profile, you’ve got to be involved in some really shady stuff to get arrested. If you ask me, this was all a publicity stunt. Mason Evercore wanted attention on his company so he set up this performance. The billionaire’s scum, Laney, and I’m sorry you had the misfortune to meet him. Had I known, I would’ve tried to save you,” he finished with a queenly air.
Save me? What was I? Some helpless princess inside one of his video games? A damsel in distress he could sweep into his arms?
Unfortunately, the real world didn’t work like that. And I was living proof. But Jim rambled on and on, with no clue on how much he was hurting me.
“I still think you could take him for everything he has,” Jim said, rubbing his hands together like a scheming witch. “Tell the judge you suffered emotional damages or something. That the guy was a creep and –“
“Jim!” I cut in sharply.
The pale man looked at me quizzically, tilting his head as if he had done nothing wrong.
That got my goat. I was doing everything in my power to keep my composure when it would have given me great pleasure to slap this imbecile across the face and make sure he never defiled Mason’s name again.