"Oh, hel be back, for goodness sake," said Jessamine crossly, banging her teacup down in its saucer. "He always does come crawling home. Look at the two of you. Like youve lost a favorite puppy. "
Tessa shot Jem an almost guilty, conspiratorial look as she sat down across from him and took a slice of bread from the toast rack. Henry was absent; Charlotte, at the head of the table, was very clearly trying not to look nervous and worried, and failing. "Of course he will," she said. "Wil can take care of himself. "
"Do you think he might have gone back to Yorkshire?" said Tessa. "To warn his family?"
"I . . . dont think so," Charlotte responded. "Wil has avoided his family for years. And he knows the Law. He knows he cannot speak to them. He knows what he would lose. " Her eyes rested briefly on Jem, who was playing industriously with his spoon.
"When he saw Cecily, at the manor, he attempted to rush to her-" Jem said.
"In the heat of the moment," said Charlotte. "But he returned with you to London; I am confident he Will return to the Institute as well. He knows you obtained that button, Tessa. Hel want to discover what Starkweather knew. "
"Precious little, real y," said Tessa. She still felt obscurely guilty that she had not found more useful information in Starkweathers memories. She had tried to explain what it was like to be in the mind of someone whose brain was decaying, but it had been hard to find the words, and she remembered mainly the look of disappointment on Charlottes face when shed said she had discovered nothing useful about Ravenscar Manor. She had told them all of Starkweathers memories of the Shade family, and that indeed if their deaths had been the impetus for Mortmains desire for justice and vengeance, it did seem as if it would be a powerful one. She had kept his shock at seeing her to herself-it was baffling still, and seemed somehow private.
"What if Will chooses to leave the Clave forever?" Tessa said. "Would he return to his family to protect them?"
"No," Charlotte replied a little sharply. "No. I dont think he Will do that. " She would miss Will if he were gone, Tessa thought with surprise. Will was always so unpleasant-and often so to Charlotte-that Tessa sometimes forgot the stubborn love Charlotte seemed to feel for all her charges.
"But if theyre in danger-," Tessa protested, then fell silent as Sophie entered the room carrying a pot of hot water, and set it down. Charlotte brightened at the sight of her.
"Tessa, Sophie, Jessamine," she said. "Lest you forget, you all have training this morning with Gabriel and Gideon Lightwood. "
"I cannot do it," Jessamine said immediately.
"Why not? I thought you had recovered from your headache-"
"Yes, but I dont want it to come back, do I?" Jessamine stood up hurriedly.
"Id prefer to help you, Charlotte. "
"I dont need your assistance writing to Ragnor Fell, Jessie. Id really rather you took advantage of the training-"
"But theres dozens of replies piling up in the library from the Downworlders weve queried about Mortmains whereabouts," Jessamine argued. "I could help you sort through those. "
Charlotte sighed. "Very well. " She turned to Tessa and Sophie. "In the meantime you wont say anything to the Lightwood boys about Yorkshire, or about Will ? I could do without having them in the Institute right now myself, but theres no help for it. Its a show of good faith and confidence to continue the training. You must behave in all ways as if nothing is wrong. Can you do that, girls?"
"Of course we can, Mrs. Branwell," said Sophie immediately. Her eyes were bright and she was smiling. Tessa sighed inwardly, not sure how to feel. Sophie adored Charlotte, and would do anything to please her. She also detested Will and was unlikely to be worried about his absence. Tessa looked across the table at Jem. She felt a hollowness in her stomach, the ache of not knowing where Will was, and wondered if he felt it too. His normal y expressive face was still and unreadable, though when he caught her glance, he smiled a gentle, encouraging smile. Jem was Will s parabatai, his blood brother; surely if there were truly something to be concerned about where Will was involved, Jem would not be able to hide it-would he?
From the kitchen Bridgets voice rol ed out in a sweet high warble: "Must I go bound while you go free Must I love a man who doesnt love me Must I be born with so little art A s to love a man wholl break my heart?"
Tessa pushed her chair back from the table. "I think I had better go and get dressed. "
Having changed from her day dress into gear, Tessa sat down on the edge of her bed and picked up the copy of Vathek Will had given her. It did not bring the thought of Will smiling to her mind, but other images of Will -Wil bending over her in the Sanctuary, covered in blood; Will squinting into the sun on the roof of the Institute; Will rol ing down the hil in Yorkshire with Jem, splattering himself with mud and not caring; Will fal ing off the table in the dining room; Will holding her in the dark. Will, Will, Will.
She threw the book. It struck the fireplace mantel and bounced off, landing on the floor. If only there were some way to scrape Will out of her mind, like scraping the mud off your shoe. If only she knew where he was. Worry made it worse, and she could not stop herself from worrying. She could not forget the look on his face as he had gazed at his sister.
Distraction made her late to the training room; fortunately, when she arrived, the door was open and there was no one there but Sophie, holding a long knife in her hand and examining it thoughtful y as she might examine a dust mop to decide if there was still use in it or if it was time for it to be thrown away.
She looked up as Tessa came into the room. "Well, you look like a wet weekend, miss," she said with a smile. "Is everything all right?" She cocked her head to the side as Tessa nodded. "Is it Master Will ? Hes gone off missing for a day or two before. Hel be back, dont you fear. "
"Thats kind of you to say, Sophie, especial y as I know you are not overfond of him. "
"I rather thought you werent either," said Sophie, "least-ways not anymore . . . "
Tessa looked at her sharply. She had not had a real conversation with Sophie about Will since the roof incident, she thought, and besides, Sophie had warned her off him, comparing him to a poisonous snake. Before Tessa could say anything in reply, the door opened and Gabriel and Gideon Lightwood came in, fol owed by Jem. He winked at Tessa before disappearing, closing the door behind him.
Gideon went straight over to Sophie. "A good choice of blade," he said, faint surprise underlining his words. She blushed, looking pleased.
"So," said Gabriel, who had somehow managed to get behind Tessa without her noticing. After examining the racks of weapons along the wal s, he drew down a knife and handed it to her. "Feel the weight of the blade there. "
Tessa tried to feel the weight of it, struggling to remember what he had told her about where and how it should balance in her palm.
"What do you think?" Gabriel asked. She looked up at him. Of the two boys he certainly looked more like his father, with his aquiline features and the faint shading of arrogance to his expression. His slim mouth curled up at the corners. "Or are you too busy worrying about Herondales whereabouts to practice today?"
Tessa nearly dropped the knife. "What?"
"I heard you and Miss Col ins when I was coming up the stairs.
Disappeared, has he? Not surprising, considering I dont think Will Herondale and a sense of responsibility are even on speaking terms. "
Tessa set her chin. Conflicted as she was about Will, there was something about someone outside the Institutes smal family criticizing him that set her teeth on edge. "Its quite a common occurrence, nothing to fuss about," she said. "Wil is a-free spirit. Hel return soon enough. "