Hollywood Dead (Sandman Slim 10) - Page 73

“What if I took some kind of blood oath? One of those ones that will kill me if I welch on the deal?”

“That’s a good try, and in different circumstances, I might accept the offer. But not with you.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re deranged. You said it yourself.”

“He’s got you there,” says Kasabian. “You really are a fruit bat.”

I look from him back to Howard.

“Offer me another deal,” he says. “See how far that gets you.”

He’s right. There’s no way I’m going to convince him. Not now, at least.

I whisper some Hellion hoodoo and Howard falls over with a thud.

Kasabian says, “Oh shit. Did you kill him? We don’t need dead people around here.”

“Calm down. He’s just unconscious. I’m going to keep him like that until I figure things out.”

“No. Get him out of here.”

I look at the back of the store.

“Does Candy still use the storage room for band practice?”

“No. It’s just full of junk.”

“Perfect.”

Kasabian follows me as I carry Howard to the storage room.

“Please don’t do this. I’m asking you to be a person for one minute and get him out of here.”

I dump Howard behind a box of old skin flicks. The store doesn’t even carry those anymore, so no one is likely to look there.

I turn around to Kasabian.

“Listen. I have maybe twenty-four hours before I melt like a Morlock in The Time Machine.”

“I love that movie,” he says. “You mean the original, right? Not the stupid remake.”

“Of course I mean the original. I always mean the original.”

“Yeah. At least you’re smart there. Now get him out of my store!”

“I’m not lying to you. I’m not here to trick you or fuck with you. This is me as fucked up and scared as I’ve ever been. I only have one chance at staying in the world. You don’t want me around and maybe Candy doesn’t want me around either, but I have to be human enough again to have that conversation. I mean it, Kas. Help me with this. And after, if Candy tells me to take off, you’ll never see me or hear from me again.”

He thinks that over for a minute.

“That’s something I’ve wanted for a long time.”

“Then you’ll do it?”

“Twenty-four hours.”

I waggle my hand in the air.

Tags: Richard Kadrey Sandman Slim Fantasy
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