I stared at the text and tried to decide if there were any lingering feelings for him in my crowded heart.
There was still the bitterness of betrayal which I doubted would ever fully go away, and the echo of my own shame that I hadn’t give him a proper chance to explain his sexuality to me. It was my fault as much as his that our relationship hadn’t worked out, but I still wished he hadn’t fallen in love with my little sister.
There was just so much history between Giselle and I. At this point, I wished them all the best, I really did, because they clearly made each other happy and I wanted that for them both.
But even as in love with Dante as I was, falling more and more into it every day, I didn’t know if I’d ever be close with either of them again.
I didn’t know if I had the strength to face the demons both of them represented as individuals and I unit.
My phone rang again in my hand, Mama’s name popped up on the screen.
I hesitated.
Mama was my confidant as much a Beau. She had stood by me through the entire Daniel and Giselle affair. But I could realize, especially as I stared at the Polaroid of her on Tore’s wall, that I hadn’t been the same confidant to her.
It made me want to keep my own secrets from her.
It was spiteful and unhealthy, but that was my instinct.
Only Sebastian’s voice in my head talking about the distance all our secrets had caused between our family members made me pick up her call.
“Mama,” I murmured as I moved out of the hall into the kitchen. It was a gorgeous, rustic space, but I didn’t linger. The massive glass doors to the patio were open so I moved through them to the warm, citrus-scent air of the back garden.
The fragrance reminded me of Dante and made my smile.
“Lottatrice mia,” Mama said warmly. “I read in the paper Dante has runaway. This is bad, no?”
I bit my lip as I went to the round, worn wood table under the trellis and took a seat in a cushioned chair. “Well, if he was to return to the country, he would go to jail for bail jumping. They could let him off with a fine and/or community service, but the prosecution wants him too badly to agree to that.”
“So he has left forever?” She sounded deeply morose about the idea, which surprised me. To my knowledge, Dante and Mama hadn’t interacted more than a handful of times over the years.
“I don’t know,” I answered truthfully.
“What does this mean for you?”
I chewed my lower lip, noticing a deliberate scar in the wood table. My breath caught as I leaned closer to read the symbols there ‘EDD.’ Edward Dante Davenport. I could imagine Dante as a young boy sitting in this exact chair carving his initials into the table to make a permanent mark on a beautiful memory.
My fingers itched to join my name with his.
“As his lawyer?” I asked, even though I knew Mama was too shrewd to be waylaid.
“No, Lena. This man, he is right for you. Do not tell me you are not with him.”
“With him romantically or with him as in with him on the run?” I stalled.
She blew air through her lips and clucked her tongue. “Lena mia, I may be an old woman now, but do not insult me, hmm?”
I sighed. “Okay, then yes to both, I guess. We’re in Naples together, at Salvatore’s house.”
There was a pregnant pause, static with things unsaid on both ends of the phone.
“Villa Rosa?” she questioned softly.
“Yes, we’re staying here until we figure out a game plan.”
“You left the law for this man,” she murmured, almost sounding awed. “I am so happy for you.”
“What?” I blinked at the lemons rattling softly in the wind across the sloping green yard from me.
“This pleases me,” she repeated, clapping in the background. “You have need for a man like Dante, you understand? Daniel Sinclair was looking for peace, figlia mia, but you? You were always looking for chaos, si? Some one who makes you feel alive.”
So alive I burn.
I blinked unseeing at the table, my index finger tracing the outline of Dante’s initials. “I didn’t know that was what I needed until, oh, I don’t know, two days ago. How did you know?”
“I am your mother,” she stated firmly, then sighed. “I have no done many things right in this life of mine, Elena, but being your mother has always made me so proud. You are fierce and strong. Nothing pushes you to the ground for long. You are a lawyer, you like adversity. Dante, he gives you this conflict and the power to overcome it, yes?”
Yes.
She was utterly and completely right.