I squeeze her hand once before driving us back, watching her sleep not even ten minutes into battling the L.A. traffic.
When we get back, I carry her inside like I’ve had to do plenty of times, nodding at Harry who passes me on the stairs, and lay Leighton down in her room, listening to her incoherent mumblings.
Tonight only proves that I’d do anything for her, so it doesn’t surprise me that the headlines the following morning are all variations of the same story.
Kyler Bishop wins best brother award.
Youngest Bishop sister brings out the best in ex-boy bander.
Celebrity royalty: The Bishops win over the world with close-knit relationship.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Leighton / Present Day
Two missed calls. One voice message. Three texts I can’t gather myself to reply to. And that’s just from today.
I’m a jerk.
Kyler: Talk to me. Please?
Kyler: We’ll get through this
Chase: When can I see you?
Sighing, I flip the phone over so I can’t see the screen and start highlighting a few of my notes in front of me, not really paying attention to the lines I’ve probably read five times over.
It’s Dylan who flicks my ear as he passes me before dropping onto the cushion on the opposite end of the couch. “You can’t keep doing this, Lenny.”
The “this” he’s referring to isn’t hard to figure out. He’s telling me I can’t keep avoiding the people who have been reaching out to me for the past month. An entire month that I’ve hidden at Mia’s house and avoided the two people who I still get queasy thinking about.
“Just text them back.” He pops something into his mouth. Probably his favorite Chex Mix. He always liked those nasty breadstick pieces best and gave me the cereal bits.
I sigh to myself. Kyler and Chase have been trying to get me to talk to them, and it isn’t like I’ve ghosted them completely. I’ve replied to one of Chase’s many texts the same night the incident happened, telling him I was okay and staying with Mia for a while. That I’d talk to him when I was ready.
Kyler on the other hand…
My entire body flames with unwelcome heat remembering the look on his face in the briefest moment as he realized what was happening when he walked into that room. God.
It still makes me want to vomit.
The night Chase and Garrick had taken me out, something changed. It was gradual, a nagging feeling in the pit of my stomach that started when Chase dropped me off at the UCLA campus. Maybe if the girls in the group I was assigned to hadn’t talked about how excited they were to make the most out of their college experience, I wouldn’t have gotten the idea to begin with. But it was Kyler’s words, his whispered insistence in shutting down any type of thought or feeling I had, that cemented my decision.
We can’t do this, Lenny.
I wanted to grow up. Live. Experience. Do things I told myself I couldn’t do or else I’d be just like Mom.
By the time Chase picked me up, I’d made up my mind. I wanted to…feel. So, I kissed him. Kissed him in a way that told him without words that I wanted to do something else. Something more like he’d probably been waiting on for forever. To show myself that I was ready to move on and try new things.
All throughout dinner with his brother, he kept staring at me, a spark in his eyes, a question like he wondered if I’d change my mind.
I wouldn’t. I wanted it.
But then…God. Then it happened. The one moment I finally allowed myself to enjoy somebody in a way I hadn’t before was ruined by the very person my mind had imagined was between my legs, hot breath ghosting over my sensitive bundle of nerves. It wasn’t Chase in that room when he’d taken off my shirt and peeled down my leggings. And I…I didn’t bother to try harder to focus on who was there on that bed with me because I knew my brain would just go back to the person who wasn’t actually there.
I’m sure Kyler probably thinks I’ve been fooling around with Chase long before then based on the warning looks and taunts thrown at the youngest Matthews over the period of us seeing each other, but to see it is a whole different story.
“Shit happens, kid,” Dylan goes on, digging through his bowl. “It’s awkward as hell, sure, but everyone will get past it. Kyler isn’t going to think of you any differently. Chase has been trying to reassure you everything is okay, right? He wants to be there for you.”