Gross.
“I heard she pushed Danny because he wouldn’t date her.”
Okay, that last one hurt. But I ignore it all, teeth clenched tight to keep from saying
anything.
“You have English first period?” Valen asks as we push through the double doors, heading into the main hall, the familiar scent of cafeteria food and a hint of bleach hitting me immediately. We’ve compared schedules, and unfortunately, we don’t have any classes together this semester.
“Uh, yeah,” I say, pulling out my phone to double-check my schedule. “I think my locker’s down here,” I say, gesturing to the row of shiny red ones that lines the walls.
“Lame. Mine’s up there.” She points a finger toward the second floor. “It’s like the universe is intentionally trying to separate us.”
“Do you have first or second lunch today?” I ask, running my finger along the cool metal lockers until I find my number.
“Second.” She scrunches her nose.
“At least we have that together. Text me.”
Valen salutes me before spinning on her heels, walking toward the stairs at the end of the hall. I hesitate at my locker, watching her space buns bounce through the crowd until she’s no longer in sight. This isn’t my first year at Sawyer Point. Same school. Same people. But somehow, everything feels different. Because everything has changed.
The minute bell propels me into motion, and I decide to worry about my locker later, keeping my backpack on me. When I make it to English, most people are already seated, and every head whips in my direction. I don’t make eye contact with a single one of them. Mrs. Roberts—who’s surprisingly intimidating for someone who can’t be over four-foot-ten—gives me a pointed look, motioning for me to sit down with her chin.
I drop my bag onto a desk in the back of the class before taking my seat. I pull out my notebook and a pencil, and when I look back up again, everyone is still staring.
“What?” I snap, already fed up, and it’s not even eight A.M.
Some smirk and giggle, but most of them look away. Mrs. Roberts clears her throat, redirecting everyone’s attention as she starts to pass out the class syllabus, and for now, I’m all but forgotten.
Until next period.
“Okay, so maybe I overreacted,” I confess.
“Ya think?” Valen deadpans around the straw of her iced coffee from Dunkin’ Donuts. She sucks the rest of it down and tosses it into the trash. Having only forty-five minutes for lunch, our food and beverage options are limited. Living in Sawyer Point narrows the list even further, but you can’t throw a rock without hitting a Dunkin’. Most people stay on campus for lunch. Plus, the food here is exponentially superior to the stuff that passes for food at Shadow Ridge. Valen indulged me when I said I wanted to go off-campus today, but I doubt I’ll get a pass for long.
“Shut up.” I laugh, nudging her shoulder with mine. I’ve made it through all but one of my other classes relatively unscathed. Honestly, it wasn’t nearly as bad as I thought it would be. The curious looks and muffled remarks didn’t cease, but it didn’t go beyond that. I expected that much—worse, if I’m being honest. I figure if I lie low, someone will screw a teacher or something and eventually, I’ll be old news.
We part ways, planning to meet at her car, and when I walk into world history, I’m feeling cautiously optimistic. But the fleeting feeling dies, the faint smile slipping from my face when I see him. Dark brown hair a little shorter than Thayer’s and thick lips above his square chin and sharp jaw.
Holden Ames.
He sits at his desk, slouched back in his seat with his legs spread wide, like a fucking king sitting on his throne, surrounded by his loyal subjects. I should feel sad looking at the group of people I used to hang out with, but they were never my friends. Not really, anyway. Holden, on the other hand, he was my best friend. And I miss him more than my pride will allow me to ever admit out loud.
I freeze, heart in my throat when his eyes meet mine. I knew I’d have to face him eventually, but I didn’t prepare for how I’d feel if we had a class together.
He stares daggers at me, his lips curling up in disgust. My fingernails dig into the strap of my backpack as I glare right back, even though my heart isn’t in it. We all experienced a loss. But Thayer and Holden lost a brother. And even though I loved Danny like a brother, it wasn’t the same. Grieving him feels like a slap in the face to them. Like I’m not allowed to be sad when they’ve lost so much more than I have.
After long seconds, Holden shoves out of his chair, gripping his binder at his side and prowls toward me. I hold his stare, my body locking up as he gets closer, anticipating whatever verbal smackdown I’m about to receive.
“Thayer know you’re back?” he asks in that low, threatening tone that’s usually reserved for his enemies. I’m not used to having it directed toward me.
I shrug in response as if to say, how should I know?
A slow smile spreads across his face. “This should be fun.” He barrels past me, shoulder-checking me on his way out the door.
I stumble back, frowning, my gaze following his retreating back as a sinking feeling hits my gut. So much for time apart lessening the blow. So much for a fresh start.
“Mr. Ames!” Mr. Garcia calls out. But Holden doesn’t stop, throwing up his middle finger behind him in response. If he were anyone else, he’d be suspended. Or at the very least, he’d get hit with detention. But he’s Holden Ames, son of August Ames.