"It can wait until morning," I say, pleased when he slides in next to me. The roots at the base of the tree practically form a cradle, like a gigantic booth, and it's nice to have my back to something solid and secure. Kaspar sits next to me and then puts his arm around my shoulders, tucking me against him. I let go of Sterre, but the carinoux's not ready to let go of me. She puts a paw over my legs and rests her head on my thigh, so I keep petting her even as Kas holds me close. I'm sandwiched between my two favorite beings in the universe and I couldn't be happier.
Then, I send a mental apology up to Ruth, Helen, and Jade, because I feel guilty for displacing them. You're very close seconds, I promise my distant friends. Very close.
"We'll stay here tonight," Kaspar murmurs, stroking my tangled hair. "In the morning, we'll head toward the settlement. Gloom—sorry, Salvotor—thinks we're pretty close."
"There's one more gladiator out here, right? Are we safe?"
"That's why we're going to watch the camp tonight. I don't think someone else is around, but you never know. Salvotor's kind of an idiot at times, but I think it's more of a lack of life experience than anything else. He's got good instincts and better senses. I think that's how he was able to stay alive out here for so long despite being hunted." He continues to stroke my hair, the movements soothing.
"He still calls you Killer," I point out.
"I'll tell him to call me Kas, but later. For now, I'm going to hold my female." He tugs me closer, wrapping his arms around me. "She gave me the scare of my life today."
"She wasn't trying to." I tuck myself down against his chest—not an easy feat with Sterre sprawled over my lower half.
"I know." Kas gives me a little squeeze. "And…the baby? Is it okay, too, do you think?"
Considering I've had no indications other than spontaneous waterworks? "I think she's fine."
"She?"
"Or he. Whatever." I rub Sterre's small ears, listening to her rumble with pleasure. Kas's question about the baby reminds me of earlier, though, and the decision I came to. When he showed up, wild-eyed and angry on my behalf, it changed everything in my world. I realized I can't do this—all this, this universe, this life, this baby, this everything—alone. More importantly, I don't want to. "Remember earlier, when I said I never wanted you to leave me?"
He holds me tighter against his sweaty chest, and I absolutely do not mind in the slightest. "I remember. I'll make it work somehow. Maybe I can just drive farm shuttles recklessly and get a kick out of things."
Huh? I twist slightly, looking up at him. "What are you talking about?"
"You and me. Farm planet. I know I said I'd die without adventure, but I'll find a way to make it work. I'm not letting you leave me, Sunshine." His thumb strokes circles on my arm, and that small touch is just…wonderful. "My brothers will just have to find a new navigator. Which shouldn't be too hard considering I'm absolutely terrible at it. Zoey was much better than me."
I shake my head, elated. "Wait, no. You're stealing my thunder."
"I'm what?" He chuckles.
"I'm going to be a corsair with you," I say to him. "I'm not dying to farm. Fuck that. I'll corsair with you. I mean, someone needs to be the brains of the outfit, and it's clear you function best with a sidekick." I lean against him, my head on his chest. "So I'm volunteering for the job."
His hands go still against me. "I thought…you didn't want to. That you felt unsafe in space. I don't want you to feel unsafe, Sunshine."
"I don't know if you've noticed, but we've been planet-side for the last month and it's been a goddamn nightmare. Space is becoming very appealing." I poke his stomach with a finger. "And you'll be there. Maybe you can teach me how to navigate."
"Are you…sure this is what you want to do?"
"I think it is." I feel content just thinking about it. "Maybe we can travel and visit Jade and Ruth and Helen, wherever they settle. We can just bounce around and visit friends and maybe pull the occasional piratey-shit to keep your adrenaline addiction going."
He laughs, squeezing me. "And the baby?"
"You said Kivian and his mate had a baby in space, right? Maybe they can give us tips." Is it ideal? Not really. But I'd feel safer raising my baby with Kas in his element than both of us on a farm, out of our depths. "You and me, and your brothers, all piled into the ship." The thought of his brothers being constantly at our sides doesn't bother me, either. After being years stranded with no one but Jade, Helen, and Ruth to depend on, I've come to realize how important family is—found family or otherwise—and how much we rely on each other. Maybe I can convince one of them to come along with us. Or all of them.