When her tremors faded away, he leaned back, sliding his cock out of her vagina only far enough for him to remove the dildo from her ass. Then he gently fingered her abused hole to ease her down the rest of the way. Her shaking knees gave way beneath his weight as he collapsed over her, and still connected, he lay down on top of her, bracketing her shoulders between his hands as he kissed her neck, her cheek, and then the side of her mouth.
When he nestled his face beside hers, he groaned. “I’m not moving. Ever.”
“I can’t breathe,” she complained.
“Do you need to?”
“No. I kinda like being squashed. Know what a fuckin’ pancake feels like now.”
He smiled and kissed her mouth again, not wanting to pull out of her body, hoping she’d let them stay like this awhile until the heat rose between them again.
“I missed this. Missed you,” he said quietly and closed his eyes. “It’s been too damn long.”
Fingers pinched his thigh hard. “Get off me, asshole.”
He guessed she just remembered they had issues still lying between them. He sighed, pulled his cock from inside her warm body and rolled to his back. “All right. We talk.”
She drew up on her knees beside him, a sour scowl darkening her expression. “You said you’ve seen Danny, too.”
“I have. Twice. The first time was the night after you lost it at the hospital.”
“You mean, after I screamed like a fucking lunatic?” she said, her voice dead even. “I saw the look on your face.”
“I was worried about you, afraid you’d pull the stitches in your cheek,” he said carefully.
She snorted. “You thought I was nuts.”
“I thought you were hurt, still high on morphine. I didn’t think you were crazy.”
“Why didn’t you come back?” she asked, the fire leaving her voice and expression. Her shoulders slumped.
“Because I saw him,” he said hoarsely. “It broke me up. You weren’t the only one who lost someone. He was my best friend. It was hard—”
“Did you blame me?”
He pinched the bridge of his nose and rubbed it, closing his eyes, taking his time to find the right words. “I think you were distracted. You distracted him. I know what he had to be feeling.”
“What do you mean?”
He lowered his hand and locked his gaze with hers. “Sin, Danny was in love with you.”
Her mouth opened then closed. Her expression grew uncertain. “No, he wasn’t. He was my friend. Just like you were.”
“I was his friend, but I never wanted to fuck him. Never worried so much about him that I couldn’t trust myself around him.”
Sin’s eyebrow shot upward. “You’re saying it’s my fault he’s dead? That I…distracted him?”
His irritation rose along with the biting inflection of her voice. “Not your fault…exactly, but yeah. If it hadn’t been for you—”
Her chin lifted—a sure sign he’d blown it. “You’re a bastard, Jake. And you can leave right now.”
“Not yet,” he said, skimming a hand over her knee, trying to calm her. “Not like this.”
“I’ll quit tomorrow. It’s not like anyone else is gonna want to ride with me.”
Jake felt an instant wash of relief, but just as quickly hated himself for feeling that way. He knew he wasn’t being fair. “I don’t want you to quit your job.” Only, he really did. He wanted her to do anything, nothing—just not be a cop—or he thought he might go insane.
“Maybe you don’t want me to quit,” she said evenly, “but you want me to ask for a transfer, don’t you?”