Chapter 1
Aria
After the bizarre phone conversation I had with Zayden, I was very confused about my own feelings. He had apologized, and certainly sounded remorseful. If he wanted to continue this – whatever this was – he probably would not go back to his controlling ways. Or so I hoped. On the one hand, I really, really wanted to believe him—the truth was that I missed spending time with him, even though I hated to admit it. On the other hand, if I had learned one valuable lesson in my twenty years of existence, it was that people did not change. This wasn’t for lack of trying, but human nature demanded a deeply ingrained sense of self that was intrinsic to each person, and getting rid of that was not very different from getting rid of an actual organ. My dad had taught me this. Growing up, I saw the efforts he made to be more financially responsible; he really wanted to change and it was obvious even to a ten year old. Yet he managed to drag my family into bankruptcy, the price of which we were still paying today. Especially me. If it hadn’t been for my dad’s terrible decisions, I wouldn’t be in this situation right now. My mom wouldn’t be in the situation she was in to begin with. Sometimes, it was very difficult not to hate him.
My thoughts were interrupted by a knock on the door, and I was glad, because I was entering dangerous territory: Allowing my thoughts to drift towards my father was like opening a can of worms that was best left shut very tight.
“Come in,” I said yawning.
The door swung open. It was Nick. “So, you’re being kidnapped for breakfast.” He looked pleased with himself, perhaps because he had been trusted with the job of kidnapping me. Stacey usually saved any endeavor that involved persuading me for herself, knowing Nick was too weak against my glare.
“I am starving. I’ll get ready in five.”
“Wait, what?” Nick looked disappointed. “You aren’t going to make me convince you?”
“No, Nick, I’m sorry,” I laughed. “Tell you what, I’ll tell Stace I didn’t want to go, but you worked your big Nicholas charms and I changed my mind.”
“This is why I keep you around,” he said and winked. “She’s meeting us at the diner. She went for a run. I don’t know what’s gotten into her.”
“She wants to be healthy?” I asked quizzically.
“What for?” He looked so clueless I wanted to pet him. “What does that do? She is already perfect, as far as I see it. Is she trying to tell me to work out more?” He tentatively surveyed his skinny arms.
I sighed. “It’s not a trick. She’s been reading too many blogs again. You know she’s a hypochondriac. She thinks she will die of a premature stroke if she doesn’t start running.”
He shook his head in what appeared to be disapproval and frustration. “Five minutes, Aria.”
---
To my relief, the diner wasn’t cramped like it tended to be during breakfast hours. Today was the day I was finally going back to work after all the drama, and I really needed a nice, calm morning to get through what was sure to be an action-packed day.
Stacey was already seated and waiting for us at a booth when Nick and I entered. She was still in her exercise-wear and looked very energized. Maybe I needed to start joining her in these morning runs. I sure could use the pick-me-up.
“Had a nice workout?” I asked Stacey sitting across from her as Nick found his way next to her.
“It was incredible! Did you know there is a hiking trail behind the lake? And clearly not many people have discovered it because I have been going every morning and it is just me and beautiful birds and swans by the lake. It’s mesmerizing.”
“Will it be as mesmerizing if you had company?” I asked tentatively.
Stacey’s whole face lit up, as Nick banged his on to the table, as though unable to understand why not one but two people in his life suddenly wanted to run in the morning.
“Aria, I’ve wanted you to join me this whole time!” She sounded very excited. “But you’ve been, you know, having a rough week, and I didn’t want to make it seem like I was pushing – but I mean – I did think it would help you work through some of the stress from–”
“Calm down, Stace,” I said giggling. “You don’t have to be nervous about asking me to do anything with you. You know that! So how about tomorrow morning?”
“Yep, get ready by five.”
“No way! How long do you run?” I checked the time; it was eight in the morning. One hour until I had to be at the bank.
“Well, I only run for probably an hour total. But I sit by the lake and think and write on my blog and it’s so wonderful. It’s like–”
Stacey’s voice was interrupted by Nick’s hysterical laughter. “You take your laptop on your runs?”
She gave him a really confused and affronted look. “Of course. I take my car to the hiking trail, leave my laptop in it, run for an hour, and then sit down and write while I enjoy nature.”
“Sure, enjoy ‘nature’,” he said making air quotes with his hands.
Stacey raised her voice. “At least I’m outdoors and not spending all my time locked in a room playing video games.”
Nick opened his mouth but before he could say anything, Stacey added, “I will put a dollar in the jar, whatever.”
“The jar?” I asked the both of them, slightly amused.
“We have devised a system,” Nick answered pleasantly. “Every time Stacey gives me a hard time about my video games, or I give her a hard time about her blogs, we have to put a dollar in an individual jar. At the end of each year, we are going to count both jars, and whoever has less gets to pick a present that the collected money will buy.”
“You guys are so perfect,” I said, yet again amazed by their relationship. “How do you do it?” I asked and then laughed.
“Lots and lots of dollars in the jar,” Stacey sighed and we all laughed.
Would I ever have what they had… with Zayden? Was he even capable of this kind of comfortable affection? Everything was grand in his life, everything was upscale and elaborate– fancy cars, expensive restaurants, personal chefs. Did he ever just have a day to pursue the little things in life, in a non-calculated manner? I knew the answers to all these questions, which gave me one more reason to keep my cool when I met him later today. We were never going to be right for each other like Nick and Stacey were. And who was I even kidding? He didn’t want to be right for me now, did he? He just wanted me to obediently finish his contract so he could feed his ego; there was never any deception there, never a grey-area about his motives. He wasn’t exactly asking me – nor had he ever asked me– to be his girlfriend— just his subordinate who did his bidding and entertained him from time to time, who he could control, and tell her who she can or cannot talk to. As a fresh sur
ge of anger started boiling deep inside of me, I tried to distract myself with the menu.
“What are you guys having?” I asked, forcing a smile.
I got bacon and eggs over-easy, Nick got two omelets, and Stacey, to both of our surprise, got a garden salad, making me suspect that there was more to why she was running. She was obviously hiding something from us. Stacey loved food more than anything and always mocked people on diets. Early morning runs to be “healthier” I could buy, but this, this was not the Stacey I knew. Wondering about what she was hiding momentarily took my mind completely off all my other worries. A glance at Nick told me he was thinking the same things, but we made eye contact and silently decided not to pick at her for the moment. Instead, I decided to bring up my own woes.
“So guys, I am finally seeing him today,” I said, looking at Nick because watching Stacey nibble at the carrots was bound to make me laugh.
“Womp womp,” Nick said. He was also not looking at her. “So this is it then? You are going to break it off?”
“I think so…” I thought of what I wanted to communicate to them exactly, but then realized I didn’t know. They had yet to hear about my phone conversation with Zayden. “He called me the other night. And apologized for being so controlling.”
“He did?” Stacey sounded genuinely surprised. “Are you sure?”
“I don’t think he could mean much else by the words ‘I’m sorry’,” I said, snappier than intended.
“No, I mean like, did he say he was apologizing for being controlling? Not just like a general ‘I’m sorry we’ve been having a fight and I want you to come back, so I’m backing down kind of a thing?”