“You have?” my mother asked, a smile on her face. “Oh, that’s wonderful! I’m so happy to hear that. I kind of had a feeling that would happen. And then... Declan had mentioned that she had stayed over here the other night. He’s so happy that you guys are back together.”
“I am, too. I’d been planning to talk with her, but she actually came over to talk to me the other night. And... I might as well tell you this, too...she knows.”
My mother’s eyes widened. “She knows? You mean...about Declan?”
“Yes, about Declan.”
“Did you tell her?”
“No.”
“Then how does she know?”
“Ben told her.”
“He did? Why would he do something like that?”
“He wanted her to understand, I think.”
My mother shook her head. “It’s no business of his.”
“She’s not going to tell anyone,” I said. “She’s not going to tell Declan.”
My mother was quiet for a moment, her lips pressed together into a thin line. “That’s good. I hope she wouldn’t. But you don’t know if she might tell someone else, who will tell someone else...that’s how it gets started, and then suddenly, the whole town knows. Is that what you want? Do you want Declan to find out because some kid goes up to him on the playground someday and tells him?”
“Of course not,” I said. “And I don’t think that’s going to happen. But if Allie and I are going to be in a relationship, then I want to be completely honest with her. I probably wouldn’t have told her this soon, but it would’ve come up. If the roles were reversed, I would want to know this about her.”
“I am happy to hear that you guys are going to try to work things out,” my mother said.
I only nodded; I decided not to elaborate that there was really nothing to “work out” between us, as if we had some major conflict that we needed to resolve. If that were the case, I wouldn’t have told her about Declan to begin with.
Chapter Thirty-Three
Allie
I wasn’t going over to Cole’s house every single night after work, but it was
pretty close. We’d all do something together outside—go for a swim, take a bike ride, play Frisbee in the backyard—and then we’d have dinner, either out somewhere or back at Cole’s place. And then we’d hang out some more, Declan would get ready for bed, and Cole and I would usually sit out on the deck and drink a beer, or relax in the hammock under the star-filled sky.
Tonight, we were sitting on the deck. I had almost finished my beer when Cole stood up and asked me if I wanted another one.
“No, I think I’m good,” I said.
“I’m going to grab another one.”
He went inside and then returned a moment later with a new bottle of beer. He sat down and took a long sip.
“So,” he said. “I’ve been thinking a lot about this whole thing with Declan. It’s been a relief to have been able to tell someone else about it, but at the same time, that’s made me think about it in a different way.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well... I guess I just mean now that you know—and you’re someone who wasn’t there through the whole thing, like Ben or my parents were—that’s got me wondering how this whole thing must seem to you, and maybe you think that I did the wrong thing, or I’m doing the wrong thing by not telling Declan.”
“Cole,” I said. “It doesn’t matter what I think, because this situation isn’t about me.”
“It does matter what you think though,” he said. “To me, it does.”
“I appreciate you saying that. But in this situation...it doesn’t involve me. Or, it might now because I’m part of Declan’s life, but all this was happening long before I knew you guys, so you made the choices you felt you had to at the time.”