“Of course,” she replied. “You were a fighter, right from the get-go. This breakup is not going to slow you down, not in the slightest.”
I actually managed to smile. “You always make me sound so much cooler than I really am.”
“You’ve always underestimated yourself, Natalie,” Mom said. “It’s time to stop underestimating yourself and realize what an amazing girl you are.”
“You might be a little biased,” I teased.
“I also happen to be right.”
“Thanks, Mom,” I said softly.
“Call me anytime, my darling,” she said. “And, don’t let this breakup get you down.”
“I won’t,” I promised, even though it was a promise without any real hope behind it.
After I hung up, I sat in the dark, staring at the opposite wall, waiting for the moment when my pain wouldn’t feel quite so acute. I was seeing Chance’s handsome sculpted face before me when the door opened and Missy walked in. She turned on the lights and screamed the moment she saw me.
“Jesus!” she exclaimed. “What the hell are you doing sitting there in the dark, you nearly gave me a… Nat?”
Her eyes fell to my face, and instantly her tone changed. She closed the door and walked towards me. “Nat,” she said again. “What happened?”
I felt a tear slip down my cheek. “We were wrong,” I said softly. “We completely misread tonight.”
“What do you mean?” she asked. “What happened?”
“He broke up with me,” I said, and the words tasted like vinegar.
“He did not,” she said in disbelief.
I shook my head. “He was so…distant during dinner. I just chalked it up to nerves. It actually made me surer that something big was coming. I really did think he was going to propose. At the very least, I thought he was going to ask me to move in with him. I thought how cute it was that he was so nervous.”
“He really broke up with you?” Missy asked again.
“He said that he was over me, he was over the relationship,” I said. “He told me I was too immature and that he was just having fun.”
She frowned. “That doesn’t make any sense.”
“That’s exactly what I thought,” I nodded, wiping the tears from my cheeks. “I thought he was joking at first; I refused to believe him. But he was dead serious. He looked at me like he barely knew me. He looked at me as though the last year had meant nothing to him.”
“I don’t get it,” she said, in frustration. “He claimed to have loved you. He took you to fucking Paris.”
I shrugged and shook my head. “Apparently, he only thought he loved me,” I said. “It wasn’t real to him. He was just…having fun.”
“I feel like we’re missing something.”
“It’s called denial,” I said. “I felt it at first. But now…”
“Now what?”
“It makes sense,” I said, wringing my hands together.
“What makes sense?” she demanded.
“Of course, he was just having fun,” I said. “Of course he wasn’t really in love with me. Why would he be? I’m not special, I’m not particularly beautiful, and I certainly don’t have the experience. What made me think we would be together forever? I was caught up in the fairytale, and I failed to remember that life is not a fairytale.”
Missy breathed noisily. “Did he give you any indication that he was unhappy?”
“If he did, I obviously missed all the signs,” I said. “The fact that I thought he was going to propose proves that.”