“I’m…okay?” It sounded like a question.
“I know I hurt you,” she said softly, turning her face down towards our shadows. “I know I was wrong to have believed Brent… I know I was wrong to suspect you even for a minute. All I can say is that I was wrong, I’m so unbelievably sorry and I hope that you can find it in your heart to forgive me.”
I didn’t know how to respond. Could I forgive her? I wasn’t even sure. One thing I knew for certain was that I didn’t want to hurt Megan either. I just wasn’t sure I could be with someone who didn’t believe in the best version of myself.
“I know you’re sorry,” I said at last because I couldn’t just leave it like that.
“But you don’t know whether you can forgive me, do you?” she asked.
I could tell she was trying really hard not to cry. I wanted to reach out for her, but my pride kept me from moving. “No… I don’t.”
I saw one pearly tear fall from her eyes and then she looked away from me as more started to fall. I just sat there and let her cry, but I did reach out to take her hand. She gripped my hand tightly and returned the pressure, as though I had just offered her a lifeline. We sat like that for several minutes, until Megan’s sobbing finally faded, and the tears began to dry on her face.
“I know what I did broke our relationship,” Megan said, and the crying seemed to have given her voice strength. “I know that I broke your trust in me. I know you must hate me now.”
“I don’t hate you,” I said firmly. “I could never hate you.”
“After what my brother did—”
“Brent’s actions have nothing to do with you,” I said firmly. “I don’t blame you for the fact that your brother framed me.”
“But you do blame me…”
“It’s not blame, Megan,” I said. “It’s hurt. My life…it’s been hard, and I haven’t always had a lot of people to turn to. But the people I do have in my life… I need them to trust me. I need them to believe in me. Because there might be days when my past comes up to haunt me and I need support from the people closest to me.”
“I know,” Megan said. “I realize that now and I see what a huge mistake I made. The truly awful part is that I didn’t think you were capable of doing what you were being accused of. It’s just that…”
“You chose your brother—”
“Yes,” she said passionately. “Only, it was the wrong decision. I meant what I said on that stand in the courtroom the other day, Phil. Brent may be my brother, I have parents who I lived with for eighteen years of my life…but you are my family. It just took all this insanity to help me see that. And I promise you; it will never happen again.”
I was silent for a long time, and I could feel Megan’s fingers tense in my palm. I let go of her hand, and she withdrew it without a fight.
“Is there any hope for us?” she asked quietly.
“I don’t know right now, Megan,” I said honestly.
“I love you,” she said softly and earnestly. “Do you still love me?”
“Of course, I do.” I nodded, unable to meet her eyes. “But… I need time.”
“Then take all the time you need,” she told me. “I’ll wait.”
Chapter Thirty-Two
Megan
“You’re taking the class?” Marta asked, looking at the form on my desk.
“Yes.” I nodded. “I decided not to wait…plus I need the distraction.”
“Good for you.” She nodded. “It’s not healthy for you to be moping around, pining for Phil.”
“I’m not pining,” I said defensively. “I’m just…hopeful.”
“Any news?”
I knew what she was really asking. “Not really,” I sighed. “After that talk we had at the park, I haven’t seen or spoken to him. And that was almost a week ago.”