“Megan,” Phil said, surprised. “I didn’t expect you to call.”
“Why not?”
“I don’t know… I suppose the last time we spoke, you left kind of abruptly. I sort of got the impression that you were upset with me about something.”
I tensed up a little, wondering if I should answer him back with the truth or just a casual excuse that meant avoiding the topic altogether.
“I wasn’t upset,” I said because I was a coward. “I was just…tired.”
“Hey, I can understand that.”
“I’m sorry I hung up so abruptly,” I said.
“Oh, don’t worry about it,” Phil said easily.
I paused for a moment, realizing that I’d been looking forward to talking to him all day. It was not the healthiest place for me to be right now, especially considering that Phil didn’t seem to feel the same way. It had been a month now since we’d met at Brent’s party and we hadn’t seen each other since then. And yet, we had shared dozens and dozens of phone calls. We had literally spent hours talking to each other, but I felt like he was a mystery to me and I n
eeded to delve deeper.
“Phil, can I ask you something?” I said, speaking on a whim.
“Of course.”
“We’ve been talking for a month now, and I still don’t know much about you.”
“Seriously?” Phil seemed surprised. “You know tons about me.”
“I know your movie preferences. I know what music you listen to. I know what food you like. I know all about your job, even though I’d like to know more. But I don’t know about your childhood, your family life, your parents.”
There was a pause on the other line. “I don’t like talking about my past, to be honest,” Phil said, finally breaking the silence. “I like to keep that stuff in the past where it belongs.”
I nodded. Then realizing that he couldn’t see me, I spoke. “Okay… I understand if you feel like you can’t share that with me.”
“It’s not about you, Megan,” he said gently. “Please don’t misunderstand me. I’m not saying I don’t trust you. I just don’t like to bring up the things we can’t change. You just end up dwelling on them and that makes you bitter. I spent a good portion of my life being angry about different things, and I don’t want to hold on to that anger anymore.”
“Okay,” I said quietly. “I hear you.”
“Thank you,” he said. “How was work?”
It was a predictable turn to a more acceptable topic, and I felt a little disappointment creep in. I had to face the fact that I was crushing deeply on Phil. Our late-night conversations had only served to make matters worse.
“Work was fine,” I replied distractedly. “I’m getting the hang of things. I like the working environment, and I’ve made a friend, too.”
“Do tell.”
“Her name is Marta,” I said. “She sits in the cubicle next to mine. She mentioned that this company offers a wide range of courses to their employees at discounted rates. They’re all about educating their staff. They believe it translates into long-term productivity.”
“That’s smart,” Phil said approvingly. “I’m glad there are companies out there who do that kind of thing. You think you’ll take up a few courses?”
“Not right now,” I said. “But it’s nice knowing I have an option. I know this makes me a nerd, but I quite enjoy studying.”
“That doesn’t surprise me,” he laughed.
“Would you have gone to college?” I asked. “If you had been given the opportunity, that is?”
Phil gave himself a moment to think about it. “It’s hard to say really. The kid I was seven, eight years ago was not right for college. I wouldn’t have had the patience or the diligence to stick to that kind of commitment. I did complete my GED when I was twenty, though.”
“So that you could become a firefighter?”