His words drilled into the center of me, wiping out my hope for something more happening between us. Of course, his life was too complicated to consider taking me out for a date. Why guys had to think it was all or none, black or white always left me confused.
"No, it's good. I'm interested in a friendship. I just got out of a nasty relationship, anyway." I moved up to turn the heater on higher and swallowed the hot ball of rejection lodged itself in my throat.
I had berated myself ten different ways by the time Tate pulled the truck to a stop.
"Well, shit. The road’s blocked." He let out a frustrated growl.
"It's okay. We'll go another time." I pulled out my phone. "Besides, it looks like my friends are ready to get home. It was nice just getting away."
"Yeah, but we didn't learn anything about each other." He growled again and turned the truck around. "I should have brought the fucking bike. At least we could have gone around the blockage."
For someone who wanted a friendship, he sure seemed upset.
I forced myself to make idle chit-chat with him until we got back to the party. He was either bipolar or I was making shit up where the two of us were concerned. Why things couldn't just go the way I expected them too in one area of my life was beyond me.
"Hey, let's go out for something to eat soon." He glanced over at me as we parked back out amongst the cars.
"Sure. You have my number." I gave him a tight smile and got out of the truck without another word. Not only had I almost kissed him earlier and looked like an idiot, but I'd left the party thinking something was going to happen more than the disappointment of hearing that I was being friend-zoned.
"Whatever. You don't even know him." I walked back in to find Amy talking with Kade in the kitchen.
At least something is going right tonight.
Chapter 14
Tate
She was upset, and I was kicking myself. Why the fuck I felt the need to friend-zone her was beyond me. I had every intention of taking her up to the lake, getting to know her better, and making her pant with a long, hot make-out session in Sam's truck.
I texted him as I watched her walk back toward the house. My jacked up sense of self-protection had kicked into gear and ruined the night. I could see by the slight rounding of her shoulders that she was hurt.
"Dammit." I hit the steering wheel and let my head fall back as I waited for Sam. He walked out a moment later, looking rather confused.
I got out of the truck, but left it running.
"What the hell, man?" His eyebrow lifted sharply.
"They blocked the road." I shrugged and pulled my bike keys from my pocket. "I'm going home. Stay if you want to."
"What happened? I just saw Val walk back in the house looking like you kicked her in the chest." His brow pulled tight, and I was trapped.
"I friend-zoned her. I don't know why. I really like her, but I guess I'm just a pussy." I ran my fingers through my hair and pulled hard. "Ugh, I fucking hate myself sometimes."
"Then get in there and fix things. She's quite possibly one of the prettiest girls I've ever seen, Tate, and she didn't seem like a bitch, at all." He pushed at my chest. "What's wrong with you?"
"No, I'll catch you later." I didn't wait for his reply, but jogged to my bike, got on, and drove like a bat out of hell the whole way back to the house. I was furious with myself by the time I got home. Not only had I ignored her all week after she returned my kindness, but then I'd dropped a bucket of cold water in the middle of whatever was starting between us.
"What the fuck is the matter with you?" I jerked my coat off as I walked into the house to find my mom still up.
"With me?" Her lips turned up into a smile.
"No, Mom. Sorry." I tossed my coat onto the couch and walked into the kitchen as indecision tore up my insides. "Me. I'm an idiot."
"Why is that?" She followed me into the kitchen and wrapped me in a hug from behind. "You're one of the smartest guys I know. If you messed up, then you fix it, right?"
"Right. I wish it were that easy." I untangled myself from her hold and walked to the back door to stare out at the thick snow that had covered the ground. "I'm scared."
"What? You scared? No..." She laughed and sat down at the kitchen table as I turned to face her.