Sally knew something was up as soon as she got back into the locker room, in her shiny new breastplate and soup-bowl helmet. Coppers of various species were standing around trying to look nonchalant. Coppers are never any good at this.
They watched as she approached her locker. She opened the door, therefore, with due care. The shelf was full of garlic.
Ah. It starts, and so soon, too. Just as well she"d been prepared ...
Here and there, behind her, she heard the faint coughs and throat-clearings of people trying not to laugh. And there was smirking going on; a smirk makes a subtle noise if you"re listening for it.
She reached into the locker with both hands and pulled out two big fat bulbs. All eyes were on her, all coppers were motionless as she walked slowly around the room.
The reek of garlic was strong on one young constable, whose big
grin was suddenly caked with nervousness at the corners. He had the
look about him of the kind of fool who"d do anything for a giggle. "Excuse me, constable, but what is your name?" she said meekly.
"Er ... Fittly miss. .."
"Are these from you?" Sally demanded. She let her canines extend just enough to notice.
"... er, only a joke, miss. .
"Nothing funny about it," said Sally sweetly. "I like garlic. I love
garlic. Don"t you?"
"Er, yeah," said the unhappy Fittly. "Good," said Sally.
With a speed that made him flinch, she rammed a bulb into her
mouth and bit down heavily. The crunching was the only sound in
the locker room.
And then, she swallowed.
"Oh dear, where are my manners, constable?" she said, holding
out the other bulb. "This one"s yours . .
Laughter broke out around the room. Coppers are like any other
mob. The table"s been turned, and this way round it"s funnier. It"s a
bit of a laugh, a bit of fun. No harm done, eh?
"Come on, Fittly" said someone. "It"s only fair. She ate hers!" And
someone else, as someone always does, began to clap and urge "Eat!
Eat!" Others took it up, encouraged by the fact that Fittly had gone
bright red.
"Eat! Eat! Eat! Eat! Eat! Eat! Eat! Eat! Eat!Eat!Eat!"
A man without an option, Fittly grabbed the bulb, forced it into
his mouth and bit it hard, to the accompaniment of cheers. A