"My predicament is that you"ve locked me up! Why? I saved your king, didn"t I?"
"There is... conflict."
"Someone let that chandelier down!"
"Yes, indeed. A member of your staff, it appears."
"You know that can"t be true! Detritus and Littlebottom were with me when - "
"Mister Skimmer was on your staff?"
"He... Yes, but... I... he wouldn"t - "
"I believe you have such a thing in Ankh-Morpork as the Guild of Assassins?" said Dee calmly. "Correct me if I am wrong."
"He was up at the tower!"
"The damaged tower?"
"It was damaged before he - " Vimes stopped. "Why would he smash up one of the towers?"
"I did not say he would," said Dee. The flat calm was still there. "And then, your grace, it has been suggested that you gave a signal just before the thing came down..."
"What?"
"A hand to the cheek, or something. It has been suggested that you anticipated the event."
"The thing was swaying! Look, let me talk to Skimmer!"
"Do you have supernatural powers, your grace?"
Vimes hesitated. "He"s dead?"
"We believe he became entangled in the winch mechanism in the process of releasing the chandelier. Three dwarfs were dead around him."
"He wouldn"t - " Vimes stopped again. Of course he wouldn"t. It"s just that he"s a member of this Guild we have, and you certainly know that, don"t you -
Dee must have seen his expression. "Quite so, quite so. Everything will be investigated thoroughly. The innocent have nothing to fear."
The news that they have nothing to fear is guaranteed to strike terror into the hearts of innocents everywhere.
"What have you done with Sybil?"
"Done, your grace? Why nothing. We are not barbarians. We have heard nothing but good reports of your wife. She is upset, of course."
Vimes groaned. "And Detritus and Littlebottom?"
"Well, of course they were under your command, your grace. And one is a troll and the other is... dangerously different. And that is why, and precisely for that reason, they are under house arrest in your own embassy. We do respect the traditions of diplomacy and we will not have it said that we have acted out of malice." Dee sighed. "And then, of course, there is the other matter - "
"Are you going to accuse me of stealing the Scone, too?"
"You laid hands on the King."
Vimes stared. "Huh? A ton of candlestick was about to fall on him!"
"This has been pointed out - "
"And I"m imprisoned for saving him from an assassination attempt I planned?"