"Ah, there was something..." Inigo leafed through the book on the table. "They could send up an emergency flare if there was a big problem. Yes, the tower nearest Ankh-Morpork will send out a couple of men, and a bigger squad comes up from the depot down on the plains. They take a downed tower very seriously."
"Yes, well, it could cost them money," said Vimes, peering into the mouth of the mortar. "We need this tower working, Inigo. I don"t like being stuck out here."
"The roads aren"t too bad yet. They could be here by tomorrow evening. I"m sure you shouldn"t do that, sir!"
Vimes had pulled the mortar out of its tube. He looked at Inigo quizzically.,
"They won"t go off until you light the charge in the base," he said. "They"re safe. And they"d make a stupid weapon, "cos you can"t aim them worth a damn and they"re only made of cardboard in any case. Come on, let"s get it on to the roof."
"Not until dark, your grace, mmm. That way two or three towers on each side will see it, not just the closest."
"But if the closest towers are watching they"ll certainly see - "
"We don"t know that there is anyone there to watch, sir. Perhaps what happened here has happened there too? Mmm?"
"Good grief! You don"t think - "
"No, I don"t think, sir, I"m a civil servant. I advise other people, mmm, mmph. Then they think. My advice is that an hour or two won"t hurt, sir. My advice is that you return with Lady Sybil now, sir. I will send up a flare as soon as it"s dark and make my way back to the embassy."
"Hold on, I am Commander in - "
"Not here, your grace. Remember? Here you are a civilian in the way, mmhm, mmm. I"ll be safe enough - "
"The crew weren"t."
"They weren"t me, mmhm, mmhm. For the sake of Lady Sybil, your grace, I advise you to leave now."
Vimes hesitated, hating the fact that Inigo was not only right but was, despite his claim to mindlessness, doing the thinking that he should be doing. He was supposed to be out for an afternoon"s drive with his wife, for heaven"s sake.
"Well, all right. Just one thing, though. Why are you here?"
"The last time Sleeps was seen he was on his way up here with a message."
"Ah. And am I right in thinking that your Mister Sleeps was not exactly the kind of diplomat that hands around the cucumber sandwiches?"
Inigo smiled thinly. "That"s right, sir. He was... the other sort. Mmm."
"Your sort."
"Mmm. And now go, your grace. The sun will be setting soon. Mmm, mmm."
Corporal Nobbs, President and Convenor of the Guild of Watchmen, surveyed his troops.
"All right, one more time," he said. "Whadda we want?"
The strike meeting had been going on for some time, and it had been going on in a bar. The watchmen were already a little forgetful.
Constable Ping raised his hand. "Er... a proper grievance procedure, a complaints committee, an overhaul of the promotion procedures... er..."
" - better crockery in the canteen," someone supplied.
" - freedom from unwarranted accusations of sucrose theft - " said someone else.
" - no more than seven days straight on nights - "
" - an increase in the boots allowance - "
" - at least three afternoons off for grandmothers" funerals per year??"