Small Gods (Discworld 13) - Page 289

“You can talk?”

Lu-Tze put a wisened finger to his lips.

“Big secret,” he said.

Brutha looked at the little man. How much did he know about him? How much did anyone know about him?

“You talk to God,” said Lu-Tze.

“How do you know that?”

“Signs. Man who talk to God have difficult life.”

“You're right!” Brutha stared at Lu-Tze over the cup. “Why are you here?” he said. “You're not Omnian. Or Ephebian.”

“Grew up near Hub. Long time ago. Now Lu-Tze a stranger everywhere he goes. Best way. Learned religion in temple at home. Now go where job is.”

“Carting soil and pruning plants?”

“Sure. Never been bishop or high panjandrum. Dangerous life. Always be man who cleans pews or sweeps up behind altar. No one bother useful man. No one bother small man. No one remember name.”

“That's what I was going to do! But it doesn't work for me.”

“Then find other way. I learn in temple. Taught by ancient master. When trouble, always remember wise words of ancient and venerable master.”

“What were they?”

“Ancient master say: `That boy there! What you eating? Hope you brought enough for everybody!' Ancient master say: `You bad boy! Why you no do homework?' Ancient master say: `What boy laughing? No tell what boy laughing, whole dojo stay in after school!' When remember these wise words, nothing seems so bad.”

“What shall I do? I can't hear him!”

“You do what you must. I learn anything, it you have to walk it all alone.”

Brutha hugged his knees.

“But he told me nothing! Where's all this wisdom? All the other prophets came back with commandments!”

“Where they get them?”

“I . . . suppose they made them up.”

“You get them from same place.”

“You call this philosophy?” roared Didactylos, waving his stick.

Urn cleaned pieces of the sand mold from the lever.

“Well . . . natural philosophy,” he said.

The stick whanged down on the Moving Turtle's flanks.

“I never taught you this sort of thing!” shouted the philosopher. “Philosophy is supposed to make life better! ”

“This will make it better for a lot of people,” said Urn, calmly. “It will help overthrow a tyrant.”

“And then?” said Didactylos.

“And then what?”

Tags: Terry Pratchett Discworld Fantasy
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