“Oh, that poem.”
“I saw Verence making notes on his napkin.”
Nanny reached again into the shapeless recesses of her clothing and produced an entire bottle of champagne you could have sworn there was no room for.
“Mind you, I thought she looked happy,” she said. “Standing there wearing about half of a torn muddy dress and chain-mail underneath. Hey, d'you know what she told me?”
“What?”
“You know that ole painting of Queen Ynci? You know, the one with the iron bodice? Her with all the spikes and knives on her chariot? Well, she said she was sure the . . . the spirit of Ynci was helping her. She said she wore the armour and she did things she'd never dare do.”
“My word,” said Granny, noncommittally.
“Funny ole world,” agreed Nanny.
They walked in silence for a while.
“So you didn't tell her that Queen Ynci never existed, then?”
“No point.”
“Old King Lully invented her entirely 'cos he thought we needed a bit of romantic history. He was a bit mad about that. He even had the armour made.”
“I know. My great-grandma's husband hammered it out of a tin bath and a couple of saucepans.”
“But you didn't think you ought to tell her that?”
“No.”
Granny nodded.
“Funny thing,” she said, “even when Magrat's completely different, she's just the same.”
Nanny Ogg produced a wooden spoon from somewhere in her apron. Then she raised her hat and carefully lifted down a bowl of cream, custard, and jelly which she had secreted there.[44]
“Huh. I really don't know why you pinches food the whole time,” said Granny. “Verence'd give you a bathful of the stuff if you asked. You know he don't touch custard himself.”
“More fun this way,” said Nanny. “I deserve a bit of fun.”
There was a rustling in the thick bushes and the unicorn burst through.
It was mad. It was angry. It was in a world where it did not belong. And it was being driven.
It pawed the ground a hundred yards away, and lowered its horn.
“Whoops,” said Nanny, dropping her just desserts. “Come on. There's a tree here, come on.”
Granny Weatherwax shook her head.
“No. I ain't runnin' this time. She couldn't get me before and she's tryin' through an animal, eh?”
“Will you look at the size of the horn on that thing?”
“I can see clear enough,” said Granny calmly.
The unicorn lowered its head and charged. Nanny Ogg reached the nearest tree with low branches and leapt upward. . .
Granny Weatherwax folded her arms.