And he was feeling let down. There were hardly any books in the castle, except for serious volumes on etiquette and animal breeding and estate management. As a rule, royalty doesn't read much.
He wasn't expecting to be amazed at the Entertainment. He'd peered behind the bit of sacking that was doing service as a dressing room, and seen half a dozen heavily built men arguing with one another. This did not bode well for an evening of thespianic splendor, although there was always the possibility that one of them might hit another one in the face with a custard pie.[33]
He had managed to get the three of them seats in the front row. This wasn't according to the rules of precedence, but it was amazing how everyone squeezed up to make room. He'd also found some peanuts. No one ever knew how he managed that.
“Oook?”
“No, thank you,” said Ponder Stibbons. “They give me wind.”
“Oook?”
“I like to listen to a man who likes to talk! Whoops! Sawdust and treacle! Put that in your herring and smoke it!”
“I don't think he wants one,” said Ponder.
The curtain went up, or at least was pulled aside by Carter the baker.
The Entertainment began.
The Librarian watched in deepening gloom. It was amazing. Normally he quite liked a badly acted play, provided enough confectionery stayed airborne, but these people weren't even good at bad acting. Also, no one seemed to be on the point of throwing anything.
He fished a peanut out of the bag and rolled it in his fingers, while staring intently at the left ear of Tailor the other weaver.
And felt his hair rise. This is very noticeable on an orang-utan.
He glanced up at the hill behind the erratic actors, and growled under his breath.
“Oook?”
Ponder nudged him.
“Quiet!” he hissed. “They're getting the hang of it. . .”
There was an echo to the voice of the one in the straw wig.
“What'd she say?” said Ponder.
“Oook!”
“How'd she do that? That's good makeup, that-”
Ponder fell silent.
Suddenly the Librarian felt very alone.
Everyone else in the audience had their gaze fastened firmly on the turf stage.
He moved a hand up and down in front of Stibbons's face.
The air was wavering over the hill, and the grass on its side moved in a way that made the ape's eyes ache.
“Oook?”
Over the hill, between the little stones, it began to snow.
“Oook?”
Alone in her room, Magrat unpacked the wedding dress.