The Light Fantastic (Discworld 2) - Page 186

It's very important that when I tell you what to do you don't say “What do you mean?” or argue or anything, understand?'

Twoflower stood to attention. At least, his rnind stood to attention, his body really couldn't. He stuck out several of his chins.

'I'm ready,' he said.

'Good. Now, what I want you to do is —'

'Yes?'

Rincewind's voice rose from the depths of the stairwell.

'I want you to come and help me up before I lose my grip on this stone,' it said.

Twoflower opened his mouth, then shut it quickly. He ran to the square hole and peered down. By the ruddy light of the star he could just make out Rincewind's eyes looking up at him.

Twoflower lay down on his stomach and reached out. Rincewind's hand gripped his wrist in the sort of grip that told Twoflower that if he, Rincewind, wasn't pulled up then there was no possible way in which that grip was going to be relaxed.

'I'm glad you're alive,' he said.

'Good. So am I,' said Rincewind.

He hung around in the darkness for a bit. After the past few minutes it was almost enjoyable, but only almost.

'Pull me up, then,' he hinted.

'I think that might be sort of difficult,' grunted Twoflower. 'I don't actually think I can do it, in fact.'

'What are you holding on to, then?'

'You.'

'I mean besides me.'

'What do you mean, besides you?' said Twoflower.

Rincewind said a word.

'Well, look,' said Twoflower. The steps go around in a spiral, right? If I sort of swing you and then you let go —'

'If you're going to suggest I try dropping twenty feet down a pitch dark tower in the hope of hitting a couple of greasy little steps which might not even still be there, you can forget it,' said Rincewind sharply.

'There is an alternative, then.'

'Out with it, man.'

'You could drop five hundred feet down a pitch black tower and hit stones which certainly are there,' said Twoflower.

Dead silence came from below him. Then Rincewind said, accusingly, 'That was sarcasm.'

'I thought it was just stating the obvious.'

Rincewind grunted.

'I suppose you couldn't do some magic—' Twoflower began.

'No.'

'Just a thought.'

Tags: Terry Pratchett Discworld Fantasy
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