‘Some sort of magical fireworks.’
‘Oh. It’s started, then.’
He lurched unsteadily out of the circle, in a way that suggested to Conina that perhaps he wasn’t quite awake yet, and staggered back towards the remains of the fire. He walked a few steps and then appeared to remember something.
He looked down at his foot, and said, ‘Ow.’
He’d almost reached the fire when the blast from the last spell reached them. It had been aimed at the tower in Al Khali, which was twenty miles away, and by now the wavefront was extremely diffuse. It was hardly affecting the nature of things as it surged over the dunes with a faint sucking noise; the fire burned red and green for a second, one of Nijel’s sandals turned into a small and irritated badger, and a pigeon flew out of the Seriph’s turban.
Then it was past and boiling out over the sea.
‘What was that?’ said Nijel. He kicked the badger, who was sniffing at his foot.
‘Hmm?’ said Rincewind.
‘That!’
‘Oh, that,’ said Rincewind. ‘Just the backwash of a spell. They probably hit the tower in Al Khali.’
‘It must have been pretty big to affect us here.’
‘It probably was.’
‘Hey, that was my palace,’ said Creosote weakly. ‘I mean, I know it was a lot, but it was all I had.’
‘Sorry.’
‘But there were people in the city!’
They’re probably all right,’ said Rincewind.
‘Good.’
‘Whatever they are.’
‘What?’
Conina grabbed his arm. ‘Don’t shout at him,’ she said. ‘He’s not himself.’
Ah,’ said Creosote dourly, ‘an improvement.’
‘I say, that’s a bit unfair,’ Nijel protested. ‘I mean, he got me out of the snake pit and, well, he knows a lot-’
‘Yes, wizards are good at getting you out of the sort of trouble that only wizards can get you into,’ said Creosote. ‘Then they expect you to thank them.’
‘Oh, I think-’
‘It’s got to be said,’ said Creosote, waving his hands irritably. He was briefly illuminated by the passage of another spell across the tormented sky.
‘Look at that!’ he snapped. ‘Oh, he means well. They all mean well. They probably all think the Disc would be a better place if they were in charge. Take it from me, there’s nothing more terrible than someone out to do the world a favour. Wizards! When all’s said and done, what good are they? I mean, can you name me something worthwhile any wizard’s done?’
‘I think that’s a bit cruel,’ said Conina, but with an edge in her voice that suggested that she could be open to persuasion on the subject.
‘Well, they make me sick,’ muttered Creosote, who was feeling acutely sober and didn’t like it much.
‘I think we’ll all feel better if we try to get a bit more sleep,’ said Nijel diplomatically. ‘Things always look better by daylight. Nearly always, anyway.’
‘My mouth feels all horrible, too,’ muttered Creosote, determined to cling on to the remnant of his anger.