Lori squeezed her eyes shut and pressed her face to Gray's neck. Cupping the back of her head as he had Magda's, he swallowed heavily and tried to calm Lori with mumbled words, soothing strokes. Inadequate offerings.
Lori's trembling built, and Gray held tighter until her first sob broke through, harsh and full. His arms tightened around her. He'd never seen her cry. Not even during their last fight before she'd left him.
He threaded his fingers through her hair and tipped his head back to stare up into the night sky. The stars seemed to wink back at him. Not a chance of escaping here, pal.
"Let me go." She twisted in his arms.
He held strong, afraid she might dart out onto the busy flight line. "In a minute. You're tired and—"
"If you call me hysterical, I'll rip your head off. Just let me go." She cried, kicked his shin, cried some more.
He winced at the jab to his leg from her foot and sucker punch to his gut from her tears. But he kept smoothing his hand over her hair until Magda's cries waned with the retreating bus.
Lori thumped a fist against his shoulder with only half the force she could have. "Damn you. Damn your bandannas and Beatles. And damn you for making me miss your smiles all over again."
Her drumming fist slowed. Her words pounded through him with double the power as she sagged in his arms.
The activity on the flight line dwindled to a hum in his ears. She simply lay against him—peaches, sweat and softness.
He stroked back flyaway strands of her hair. "It's gonna be okay, honey."
"God, Gray, I wish for once it really could be that simple." Her breath mingled with his.
"Her new family will be spoiling her rotten by morning. With any luck, she's young enough to forget."
If only he could say the same for himself. Gray knew without question he would never forget the disillusionment he'd seen in Magda's eyes. A look too much like the one he'd found in his father's eyes years ago.
Gray's arms tightened. He stared down at Lori's beautiful mouth and needed to make her smile more than he needed to sleep. And he needed sleep mighty damned bad.
"Don't think about Magda crying. Think about her in her new room."
"In her new home."
"That's right. She'll have a home and a family."
"Home and family." Lori shivered in spite of the muggy night air. "It's more than a lot of people can claim, I guess."
"Yes, it is." He wanted to drop a kiss on her head, but settled for resting his forehead against her silky hair.
She swayed against him, and Gray realized he would have to drive her home. Lori wasn't in any condition to climb behind the wheel. She needed him, even in a small way, and that shouldn't have mattered as much as it did.
"Magda will be settled by morning."
"She deserves so much more."
And so did Lori.
"I'm sorry." For wanting Lori when sex was the last thing they needed. For not being able to give her that home and family.
For knowing he was no closer to being the kind of man she needed than he'd been a year ago.
What did he plan to do when time came to say goodbye again? He couldn't leave things the way they were. That hadn't worked for the past twelve months, and he didn't expect it to be any different now.
Before he left Charleston, he needed to fix things between them, make some kind of peace. He'd allowed the questions, the unresolved issues, the tension to hang between them too long.
He needed a game plan, but solutions weren't coming any faster now than they had a year ago. And he only had two and a half weeks to find the answer.
Chapter 4