I turn on my heel and head out, remembering everything that Johanna said. The first thing I do is put my name on the sign-up for stage time and pray that this plan is going to work because the next business venture idea on the list isn’t something I want to even think about. The last resort is a line I’m hoping I never have to cross.
“Steph, I really like it here.”
It’s been a week and I’m leaving later tonight on the red-eye back to Spokane. I’ve made enough money so Morgan and I can move to a better place and put a little money into savings. Even after my initial rough start with the paperwork, I worked my ass off at two clubs and took every open shift possible, sleeping very little. And when I was sleeping, it was done outside on a chaise lounge under the sun. The room I’ve rented for the week is questionable and the last thing I want to do is bring home bedbugs. If the manager cares that I’ve been sleeping outside, he hasn’t said anything.
“You can’t move there.”
“Why not?” I’m not even sure that’s a consideration at this point but I’m curious as to what she has to say.
She sighs on the other end of the line. “Because you’d be stripping to earn a living and that isn’t the life you’re trying to lead for Morgan. This is supposed to be a means to an end, Macey, not a job opportunity.”
I know she’s right, but it’s my reality and maybe even more of a temporary relocation if that becomes an option. “Be realistic, Steph. What am I going to do when I get back? Even after Morgan and I move, I still need money and waiting tables at Eddie’s diner isn’t going to pay my rent.”
“You can apply for an office job. Do something different.”
“And do what? I don’t have the skills you do.” Stephanie has been my best friend since high school and is what I call a success story. Even though she finished community college, she chose to bartend, making a boatload of money at night. It’s something I should do, but landing that coveted weekend spot in downtown’s hottest nightclub would be hard and equally as hard would be giving up the tips I earn from stripping.
“I’m only saying—”
“I know,” I tell her. Steph is always concerned for my safety and begged me not to start stripping. Years ago, when we were kids a man killed about thirty prostitutes and we both jokingly promised we’d never become one. She doesn’t see stripping as much different. “Is Morgan there?”
“Yep, hang on.”
“Hey, Mommy.”
“Hi, little miss. Are you being good for Stephanie?”
“Yes, when are you coming home?” I can hear the sadness in her voice and it brings tears to my eyes. I hate leaving her when I go to work so being away for a week has been torture. Each time I walk into one of the clubs I remind myself I’m doing this because of her, so that I can give her a better life.
“Tonight, baby doll. I’ll be there to take you to school in the morning. You’re making sure to get your homework done?”
“Yes, every night. Judy has been helping me.”
Judy is Stephanie’s mom and likely watching Morgan when Steph is working. I never thought about what Steph would have to give up in order to watch my kid so I could come to Vegas and let my tits hang out for every horny convention and spring-break guy around.
“That’s good. Make sure you give Judy a big hug and kiss.”
“I will.”
Judy loves Morgan, but dislikes me. She always has and never wanted Stephanie to hang out with me. Thankfully, Steph makes her own decisions. I don’t know why Judy doesn’t like me, but I suppose it could have something to do with my mother. Lots of rumors floated around back in middle school that my mom had an affair with a married man and I’ve always thought it was with Steph’s dad. From what she says, her father bailed when she was in the sixth grade. At least she knew her dad. Mine has been gone from day one. Much like Morgan’s.
“I love you, little miss. I’ll see you in the morning.”
“Bye, Mommy. I love you too.”
She hangs up and I let the tears flow. I hate my life and everything it’s become. I know it’s not Morgan’s fault, but I’m always wondering what it’d be like if I didn’t have her, if I had made a different decision. The stark reality of my situation is that she saved me. I could’ve easily ended up like my mother or worse. And I love her too much to let her go. She’s the reason I take my clothes off for men who want entertainment. Morgan is my everything.