‘What time is it?’
Rico looked up, startled out of his thoughts, to see Halina standing in the doorway, her hair in a dark cloud about her face, her expression still sleepy.
‘I don’t know.’ He checked his watch. ‘About ten in the morning. You should get back in bed.’
‘I can’t spend the next five months in bed, Rico.’
‘You heard what the technician said.’
‘Yes, I did. Did you?’ With a wry smile she crossed the room and curled up on the opposite end of the sofa. ‘She said I needed to take it a bit easier, not that I needed to be bedridden.’
‘Still...’
She turned to him, her smile gone, her expression serious. ‘Don’t you think I’m going to do everything in my power to take care of this baby?’
Slightly abashed, Rico nodded. Yes, he believed that. Of course he did.
Halina drew her knees up, resting her chin on top. ‘Still, it could all go wrong,’ she said quietly. ‘We have to be prepared for that.’
‘Just as we have to do everything we can to make sure that doesn’t happen,’ Rico returned. ‘I’m going to call off the wedding.’
‘What?’ She turned to him, startled, her eyes wide and dark.
‘It’s too much strain and pressure on you. We can have a quiet wedding later, or reschedule a big ceremony, if that’s what you prefer.’
‘But all the preparations...all the money you spent...’
‘What does money matter? Your health is more important. Our child’s health. Besides, perhaps if we wait a while your father will come round and decide to attend.’
Pain flashed across her face and she nodded slowly. ‘Yes. Maybe.’ She sounded so sad that Rico ached to hold her, but he didn’t, because something about Halina right now was cool and brittle, as if she were trying to maintain a certain distance. Her next words confirmed it.
‘But Rico...if I do lose this baby...we need to talk about that.’
He tensed, his jaw clenched. ‘Let’s not court disaster, Halina.’
‘Let’s also be prepared,’ she returned evenly. ‘Isn’t that your motto? Wasn’t that why you had all those provisions in the car when we were trapped in the sandstorm in the desert? Because you like to be prepared.’
‘Yes, but—’
‘So let’s be prepared for this,’ Halina said steadily. ‘If I lose the baby, we don’t have to marry. You’re free.’
Why did he now hate that thought? ‘And what about you?’ he asked. ‘Are you free?’
‘Yes,’ Halina returned after a pause. ‘Yes, I will be. I told you before, I never wanted a marriage without love.’
He fought to keep his expression neutral when everything in him wanted to cry out, to resist and deny. ‘So what will you do, in this worst-case scenario? Return to Abkar?’
She let out a small huff of sad laughter and shrugged. ‘Maybe I’ll get that apartment in Paris I always dreamed about, with a piano and a terrace.’
But how would she do that? She had no money, no resources, and if she was free from him, her father might plan another marriage for her. But maybe Halina would prefer that, rather than be shackled to him for the rest of her life. The knowledge hurt, far more than Rico wanted it to.
‘Well, then,’ he said in a hard v
oice. ‘Now we’re prepared for the worst. So let’s hope for the best, hey? And keep you on bed rest.’
She smiled faintly. ‘In control, as always.’
‘Yes,’ Rico answered, but he didn’t feel in control at all. Now, more than ever, he felt as if things were spinning out of his grasp...especially his own heart.