I know that. He shifted his hands to her shoulders, drawing her gaze up to his face, the steady expression. You did. Youre so very dear to us, Chloe. Give yourself time. If you still want to learn how to use a gun in a month or two, Ill teach you. But like most things, its a decision best made when youre in the right frame of mind for it. Until then, Ill shoot anybody that needs shooting for you.
Just the kind of friend I need. She stared up into his handsome face, the expression that looked as i
f it could weather any storm. Can I use you for the other thing that friends are known for?
Sure, little flower, he said gently, his pet name for her. He curved his hand around her neck, caressing her cheek as she laid her head back on his chest and let herself be held some more. Curling her body up against his, she used it as a bulwark against the tears she refused to spill.
* * * * *
Brendan had wanted to turn around and look at her again, but hed made himself walk to the Jeep. Drive into Tampa, handle his morning classes. Keep a vigorously maintained wall between who he was to his students and what hed been to Chloe last night. How he might have failed her this morning. But after lunch, the wall fell. He had a work period before the advanced drama class would arrive to start the Camelot rehearsal. He stood on the auditorium stage, staring out into the darkened seating, only stage lights casting a dim, antique yellow glow on the assortment of props around him. Things to create realities not necessarily his own.
Damn it. With a curse, he brought his fist down on the table they were using as a centerpiece for this scene. It had a tapestry draped over it, so hed forgotten it was a solid oak piece theyd picked up from a rummage sale, rather than a far more advisable and expendable card table. He cursed again, with a violence and frustration that startled him as it echoed back from the vaulted ceiling. But it was the dry female voice from the darkness that made him jump.
I dont think they used that particular turn of phrase in A rthurian times.
The thin brown institutional carpeting on the aisles was worn to holes in some places, and the downward slope was broken up by the occasional single shallow step, but Marguerite navigated the unfamiliar terrain as if she were the Lady of the Lake herself. The Lady of the Lake in stylish, earth-colored, ankle strap heels, high enough to be sexy but not impractical for Tea Leaves.
She came to a halt within twenty feet of the stage, and he marveled as always at her Mistresss intuition. It put her just above his eye level. If shed come all the way to the stage she would have had to tilt her head back to look at him, something that would have been vastly unacceptable, to him at least.
We need to talk, she said.
I have a class. Not for another hour, but he just couldnt face this conversation now. There was no rancor in his tone, but since he made a point to deny her nothing, those four words were as insolent as hed ever been to her. It underscored that he was fucking up on all levels today.
Then youll be late, she said coolly. Come down here. Now.
He sighed. Inwardly. Fine. The day could only get worse. Might as well accept it.
A s he moved to the stage edge, she took one of the front-row seats, crossing those killer legs, her long slim hand lying on the armrest. Though she was a Mistress, a formidable one, she submitted to one Masters touch, and that was Tyler. A s such she often wore his collar as she did now, a beautiful choker of wire and pearls, as much evidence of their bond as the wedding ring on her finger.
When he approached, she leaned forward, extending one long-nailed hand toward the hand hed used to pummel the hapless table. With reluctance, he placed it in hers. Examining his swelling knuckles, she tsked under her breath.
She didnt invite him to sit next to her. It was automatic and steadying to drop to one knee in front of her. Bracing his free hand on his thigh, he stared at those feminine shoes, the slim ankles. Chloe had worn pumps for the wedding, but this morning shed preferred a pair of sneakers that were a fading rainbow of hand-painted colors that had seen better days. Her closet was filled with a dazzling array of shoes tumbled together like shiny gumballs, but shed chosen ones that had gone dull with the effects of time and wear.
Whats going wrong, Brendan?
Im not sure what you mean, Mistress.
Hed been the one to slow things down. One intense phone call, a drive to work and an amazing night of lovemaking happening within a two-day period seemed, on its face, a reason to slow things down. But he knew as well as Marguerite did that something was wrong. A s the silence lengthened, his Mistress waiting him out, he wryly reflected that no one could lie to that intent blue gaze, even though he wasnt really lying. He didnt know exactly why he was slowing down. Shes been through a lot. I dont want to force anything until shes stronger. I dont want to make her deal with anything else.
What hed wanted to do this morning was frame her elfin face in his hands, taste the sweet pink bow of her mouth until it heated beneath his, until all of her heated, proving he could drive the cold out of her hands, her mind, the pit of her stomach and behind her eyes. The day after their phone call, hed thought of nothing but her all day, to the point his students had teased him for his absentmindedness.
Did you know Chloe had an operation when she was five years old?
Brendans gaze shot up, but Marguerite shook her head. Nothing serious. One of those things better handled while she was still small. When they rolled her out of the hospital room and toward the operating room, she asked the nurse where they were going. The nurse made up some silliness about an enchanted fairyland. Chloe was an intelligent little girl, and the fact this well-meaning woman wouldnt tell her where she was truly going terrified her. She started screaming and thrashing.
When she tells the story, she jokes about them plopping a Fisher Price musical toy next to her as they strapped her to the operating table and administered the anesthetic. But you can see the memory of the fear she felt. If the woman had simply told her they were going to the operating room, she would have been fine. Nervous, but informed.
Brendan shifted as Marguerite continued. Men often make the mistake of thinking a wounded woman needs a lie to protect her, when just the opposite is true. Most of us have a radar for bullshit. Feeling uncertain only enhances that instability. Shes too fragile for anything less than total honesty.
Marguerite locked eyes with him before he could obey etiquette and sweep his gaze down. With you, Chloe is a different, deeper, more troubled part of herself, something she cant allow herself to be with us. The joyful Chloe still exists, but shes facing that dark side now. No one I know is more prepared than you to guide someone out of darkness, Brendan, because your own demons have never overwhelmed your light. A n A rthurian knight in truth. A faint smile touched her lips as she glanced toward the stage. Then she sobered. You might best serve Chloes needs right now by taking the reins. Show her how to drive the horse before handing them over. You understand?
He nodded. I do. Id already startedbefore I realized I was going to do it. Which is why I pulled back.
A t her raised brow, he stared down at his hand, still held inside the brace of her slim fingers. Tylers silver wedding band shone softly in the dim lighting. Shes not natural to it, Mistress. Shes messed up right now. She should only deal with one problem at a time.
Why are you assuming its a problem? Perhaps its part of the answer.
Shes not part of our world. Even if I introduced her to it, it wouldnt beinnate to her. I wont make her feel like shes failed at something thats not a test. He shook his head. Im a transition for her, and we both know it. I lost sight of that last night, and I didnt handle it well this morning. Ill call her later, apologize and smooth things over.