A warm breeze picked up once we reached the ledge. Waves crashed against the rocks below us. I had to close my eyes.
"What are you doing?" Beth squeezed my hand.
"I forgot to tell you something."
"What?"
Shit, I was sweating. "I'm terrified of heights."
"Then why are we here?"
"You said you wanted crazy. You said my apology wasn't good enough, and let's be honest, you have absolutely no reason to trust me."
"All true." She looked nervously over the edge then back at me. "So what's your point?"
"My point is you need vulnerable."
She bit down on her bottom lip and released my hand.
"You don't need crazy." I sighed. "You want crazy for you."
Beth still refused to look at me.
"Heights terrify me," I continued. "If you had asked me last week what my biggest fear was? I would have said heights. Two days ago, I would have said Frank."
Beth's warm laugh made my stomach flip.
"Ask me what I'm scared of right now."
Beth's gaze flew to my eyes. "What are you scared of now?"
"You," I whispered. "I'm scared I'm not who you think I am. I'm scared that you really have convinced yourself that I'm some sort of hero, when we both know that's the last thing people would call me. I'm terrified that if you give me a second chance, I'm just going to screw it up. I'm afraid that you'll wake up, and not want me. That you'll decide I'm not worth it. Because the truth, Beth? Guys want to be fought for too. We want to be worthy of the women we love. I want to be the Romeo, Mr. Darcy, and Avenger. But those shoes? They're pretty big ones to fill, and although I love difficult situations, I don't like the idea that one day you're going to wake up and realize how damn beautiful you really are. You are worthy of those guys and more. I know where I land on that totem pole, and it's on the very bottom, underneath the dirt and worms and crap. You'll see me waving.
Beth laughed.
"I'm serious." I pulled her into my arms. "I'm serious about you. What would you say if I told you that you were the one that got away?"
"I'd say you're crazy."
"Mission accomplished," I whispered. "And what would you say if I told you I wanted more than a few days?"
"I'd say you're out of your mind."
"What would you say if I told you I burned for you? What would you say if I told you that even before this week, you consumed my dreams?"
Beth shook her head and opened her mouth to say something.
I kissed her roughly across the mouth. "And what would you say if I told you I was going to jump?"
"Jace—"
"I'm jumping. If only to prove to you that I'm going to start conquering fears, starting with jumping and ending with you."
"Jace don't—"
I couldn't hear her words as I jumped; my blood was roaring too loud, and the wind whipping by my face wasn't helping anything. The water slapped against my body as I landed, far away from the rocks and into the warm ocean.
I didn't have time to enjoy my accomplishment, what with Beth throwing herself off the cliff in such a fashion that I was a bit concerned she was going to belly flop.